Keith Brown

A small man without much hair on my head

[Tim Farron @timfarron]

We have recalled Agent Truss from the field, her work is complete.

[Jonathan Pie @JonathanPieNews]

A new day in Westminster has dawned...

[Viz Comic @vizcomic]

subscriptions >>> https://t.co/pj3pnJSJlt

[Archie Rhind-Tutt @archiert1]

Danes singing: “You’re just a shit part of Scotland.” Brutal.

[Dr. Farbod MBBCh FRCEM @EmergencyBod]

When I saw the French navy with bagpipes on a military parade, I was not expecting an absolute banger!

[John O'Farrell @mrjohnofarrell]

Dear Telegraph readers; if you can afford £30k a year school fees *per child* then you are rich.
If you can't also afford the VAT you owe, then send your kids to your local state school.
They'll get a much more rounded education and you'll save lots of money.
You're welcome.

[Richard K Herring @Herring1967]

Be a much fairer world if only the cunts died.

[Edwin Hayward @edwinhayward]

Rishi Sunak's Big D-Day Snub - A Definitive Thread...

Rishi Sunak skipped out on the main D-Day commemorations yesterday to rush home and record an ITN interview that won't even air until Wednesday next week.

1/8

[Janey Godley @JaneyGodley]

Whooop

[John O'Farrell @mrjohnofarrell]

I think Ed Davey might be mixing up an Election Campaign with a week at Center Parcs.

[Dr Philip Lee @drphiliplee1]

A lot of you have been commenting about Northern Ireland and national service, and as a part of the UK, the youth there also deserve this opportunity.

To give it a unique identity, and highlight the benefits of volunteering we will call it the Ulster Volunteer Force.

[National Park Service @NatlParkService]

WEDNESDAY (noun/ ˈwenzdeɪ’)

1. Still not Friday.

📷@KatmaiNPS

[Liz Bonnin 💙 @lizbonnin]

The level of stupidity & ignorance displayed by Luke Johnson is staggering. This kind of denial & nonsensical rhetoric serves no purpose in a balanced debate. We have to make lying wrong again. As ever, well done @ChrisGPackham for communicating the truth.

[Brian Moore @brianmoore666]

I say this every year, but it still holds true - I wish we had an anthem that came somewhere near La Marsellaise.

[Dawn French 💙🔴🏳️‍🌈🇺🇦🇵🇸 @Dawn_French]

Twats to the left of me, twats to the right…

[Matt Green @mattgreencomedy]

One of the great tweets

[Ava-Santina @AvaSantina]

Give her all of my license fee

[John Amaechi OBE @JohnAmaechi]

The truth 🤷🏽‍♂️