Johnny Weissmuller

a Hungarian-born American competition swimmer and actor, best known for playing Tarzan in films of the 1930s and 1940s

[Johnny Weissmuller @Weissmuller99]

I be honest Frank your stretching the Casual #Friday policy dress code. Your a #welder

[Jennifer Slopez @JennSlowpez]

I bought banana scented wax for my car and the amount of excitement I feel makes me think my life is more than lacking.

[A four chin teller @MauriceGosfield]

#SignsYouAreLazy Nothing makes you happier than seeing your plans cancelled.

[MS. RedRUMHAM🐧 @ILLxSINGULARITY]

@MauriceGosfield But u can't get what u need 😭😭💁🏼‍♀️

[A four chin teller @MauriceGosfield]

#SongsThatDescribe2020
You Can't Always Get What You Want

[Joe And The Dead @joeandthedead]

RIP Florian Schneider, Kraftwerk co-founder, dies aged 73.

[The Invisible Man @JackGriffin1945]

#AwfullyBritishReasonsToCry When your next door neighbor changes his Wi Fi Password

[A four chin teller @MauriceGosfield]

#AwfullyBritishReasonsToCry
When any part of our anatomy is brushed against a stranger on public transport

[Phil Silvers Archive @ErnestBilko]

'A gem. Steve, the owner, couldn't be more helpful. This is a must visit place for fans and a fascinating homage to the great Phil Silvers.'
- Tom, Bedford.
#philsilvers #bilko #museum #coventry

[Lisa Champney @ChampneyLisa]

#AccidentalBedroomIncident
An intruder. 🤓

[E @DancingLantern]

Played too many LPs.

#AccidentalBedroomIncident

[That Greek Guy! 🇺🇸 🇬🇷 @DesignGreek]

When you scream your own name instead of your partner’s.
#AccidentalBedroomIncident

[Love Me @MarkOVZorro]

#AccidentalBedroomIncident When you invite your friends around on date night

[Emma Macdonald @EmmaMac111]

#AwfullyBritishTwitterProblems
Overreactions to a light dusting of snow

[A four chin teller @MauriceGosfield]

#IfIEverMetTrump I would ask him for the name of his hairdresser. He can cover anything up

[A four chin teller @MauriceGosfield]

#ImSoSickAndTiredOf When you hold the door open for someone and they don't say thank you

[Gaviscon' t'pub 🍻 @stgavalot]

#WhyImNotAProSoccerPlayer
I started getting served in the pub at 15 years old.... it all went down hill from then on.

[Les Kellett @WhiskyGalore0]

#WhenAndroidsTakeOver I be out off a job !!!

[A four chin teller @MauriceGosfield]

#TvShowsOnBooze Hill Street Booze