Dan Ham

Dressed from the feet up. 🍋 /// 🔴⚫️⚪️

[Dan Ham @_Dannyam]

@ianbrowncouk -it gets a few odd looks from the outsiders man x

[Dan Ham @_Dannyam]

@SimplyUtd I wouldn’t let you put my bins out! You’re the worst.

[Dan Ham @_Dannyam]

Hahahahahha makes ya think, that even this team you wouldn’t get a shirt!!😩😩

[Jamie Carragher @Carra23]

Lads, it’s Man United!

[Dan Ham @_Dannyam]

@youngy18 Mate at least your lads not like beckhams! We all know what I mean!

[Dan Ham @_Dannyam]

@liamgallagher As he faced the sun…… and I thought we had a NYC date? I’m making the America gig regardless… but it falls over my Fukin birthday day! Peace

[Dan Ham @_Dannyam]

@man_savings Anyone know how these size up? 👍🏼

[Dan Ham @_Dannyam]

🤯

[Dan Ham @_Dannyam]

@Ryan_Jones85 95. That tongue went half way up my shin 😂

[Dan Ham @_Dannyam]

@JamesCotton89 @Ryan_Jones85 @a5h_87 @PaulHoinville @Benbones93 Caused a lot aid grief this bet mind 😂

[Dan Ham @_Dannyam]

He needs to get rid of that sock under there!!!

[Matt Le Tissier ✝️ @mattletiss7]

Someone posted this on Facebook...so true!

Tax his land,
Tax his bed,
Tax the table
At which he's fed.

Tax his work,
Tax his pay,
He works for peanuts
Anyway!

Tax his cow,
Tax his goat,
Tax his pants,
Tax his coat.

Tax his tobacco,
Tax his drink,
Tax him if he
Tries to think.

Tax his car,
Tax his gas,
Find other ways
To tax his ass.

Tax all he has
Then let him know
That you won't be done
Till he has no dough.

When he screams and hollers;
Then tax him some more,
Tax him till
He's good and sore.

Then tax his coffin,
Tax his grave,
Tax the sod in
Which he's laid.

When he's gone,
Do not relax,
It's time to apply
The inheritance tax.

Accounts Receivable Tax
Airline surcharge tax
Airline Fuel Tax
Airport Maintenance Tax
Building Permit Tax
Cigarette Tax
Cooking Tax
Corporate Income Tax
Goods and Services Tax (GST)
Death Tax
Driving Permit Tax
Environmental Tax (Fee)
Excise Taxes
Income Tax
Fishing License Tax
Food License Tax
Petrol Tax (too much per litre)
Gross Receipts Tax
Health Tax
Heating Tax
Inheritance Tax
Interest Tax
Lighting Tax
Liquor Tax
Luxury Taxes
Marriage License Tax
Mortgage Tax
Pension Tax
Personal Income Tax
Property Tax
Poverty Tax
Real Estate Tax
Retail Sales Tax
Service Charge Tax
Telephone Tax
Value Added Tax
Vehicle License Registration Tax
Vehicle Sales Tax
Water Tax
Tax (VAT) on Tax.
And Now they want a blooming Carbon Tax!

STILL THINK THIS IS FUNNY?

Not one of these taxes existed 100 years ago, & our nation was one of the most prosperous in the world... We had absolutely no national debt, had a large middle class,a huge manufacturing base, and Mum stayed home to raise the kids.

What in the happened? Could it be the lying parasitic politicians wasting our money?
Oh, and don't forget the relatively new bank charges....
And we all know what we think of Bankers.

I hope this goes around the UK at least 1,000,000,000 times!!!

YOU can help it get there!

[Dan Ham @_Dannyam]

Top tier twittering this 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽😂

[steve @bagshaw2112]

It snowed last night...
8:00 am: I made a snowman.

8:10 - A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snow woman.

8:15 - So, I made a snow woman.

8:17 - My feminist neighbor complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest saying it objectified snow women everywhere.

8:20 - The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it could have been two snow men instead.

8:22 - The transgender man..women...person asked why I didn't just make one snow person with detachable parts.

8:25 - The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with.

8:28 - I was being called a racist because the snow couple is white.

8:31 - The middle eastern gent across the road demanded the snow woman be covered up .

8:40 - The Police arrived saying someone had been offended.

8:42 - The feminist neighbor complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needed to be removed because it depicted women in a domestic role.

8:43 - The council equality officer arrived and threatened me with eviction.

8:45 - TV news crew from BBC showed up. I was asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snow-women? I replied "Snowballs" and am now called a sexist.

9:00 - I was on the News as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobe sensibility offender, bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather.

9:10 - I was asked if I have any accomplices. My children were taken by social services.

9:29 - Far left protesters offended by everything marched down the street demanding for me to be arrested.

By noon it all melted

Moral:

There is no moral to this story. It is what we have become, all because of snowflakes

[Dan Ham @_Dannyam]

@cdlaughton @centrdevils @TheAthleticFC 😂😂👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

[Lohith_Rebel @Rebelism_18]

@NoContextHumans Perfect loop exists

[Dan Ham @_Dannyam]

Hahahahah

[The Life Of Brian @DaytrippingRed]

Some of the things I hate the most in life:

• Glazers entire family tree
• Onions
• Undercooked steak
• Andy Robertson
• Fancams
• Paris
• Sam Smith
• Beer in the U.K. cos it’s all piss
• West Hams away end
• Antony’s pointless right foot

[The Life Of Brian @DaytrippingRed]

Some of the things I hate the most in life:

• Glazers entire family tree
• Onions
• Undercooked steak
• Andy Robertson
• Fancams
• Paris
• Sam Smith
• Beer in the U.K. cos it’s all piss
• West Hams away end
• Antony’s pointless right foot

[Dan Ham @_Dannyam]

@Ryan_Jones85 @RaveFootage 😈😈

[Dan Ham @_Dannyam]

@Ryan_Jones85 @RaveFootage Me and you! Few shrooms 😀😀

[Dan Ham @_Dannyam]

Hahahahah you bad dickhead

[JJ @TopToffee32]

Hahahahahaha I love it

[Dan Ham @_Dannyam]

🥲🥲

[Manchester United @ManUtd]

Sir Bobby Charlton CBE, 1937-2023.

Words will never be enough.

[Dan Ham @_Dannyam]

😂😂😂😂😂😂