abbey bean

👏 their 👏 bones 👏 are 👏 their 👏 money 👏 • she/her • BLM

[abbey bean @_abbeyjean]

“aren’t you worried about-“

yes. i’m worried about it. whatever you’re about to say, i’m worried about it. don’t say it aloud. don’t speak that into existence for me. just assume i’m already worried about everything. thank you for your help.

[abbey bean @_abbeyjean]

I can’t believe the Mud Dogs are going to the Bourbon Bowl

[abbey bean @_abbeyjean]

@weedosmosis ? Farming

[abbey bean @_abbeyjean]

@baileybhudson @claire_kail where am i

[abbey bean @_abbeyjean]

@LukeBrake if she said it to me i would never recover

[abbey bean @_abbeyjean]

gonna sing “giants in the sky” from into the woods but riff aggressively every time i sing the word “sky”

[abbey bean @_abbeyjean]

i’m convinced i am an amazing detective and could solve any crime but i also second guess whether i locked the door every single morning without fail

[abbey bean @_abbeyjean]

@realbrookek or… you could audition for school of rock… just an idea just a thought

[abbey bean @_abbeyjean]

yeah sure i’m married but that doesn’t mean i can’t talk to the little solitaire lady made out of cards that dances for me whenever i win

[abbey bean @_abbeyjean]

bad news everyone: i have the chicago song from victorious stuck in my head again so i will be singing it out loud at full volume every time i space out for the next seven years

[abbey bean @_abbeyjean]

@jon_speaks_ i say you guys instead of y’all

[abbey bean @_abbeyjean]

the fact that my husband’s legal first name is joshua 🤢

[Maddy Smith @somaddysmith]

Told a guy I had body dysmorphia and he said “I love sci fi”

[abbey bean @_abbeyjean]

@baabyshirt have you tried vacuuming your mattress before putting on new sheets its disgusting i love it

[abbey bean @_abbeyjean]

this is the funniest thing i’ve ever read it’s in my real informational iud pamphlet i was given

[abbey bean @_abbeyjean]

@Alextholen_ @pants i love this !!!!!!

[m @msnetik]

Unless we can put on the best talent show this town has ever seen

[abbey bean @_abbeyjean]

texting my eight year old sister is incredibly heartwarming and also very confusing

[abbey bean @_abbeyjean]

why did anyone in gotham decide to be a security guard just seems unwise

[abbey bean @_abbeyjean]

@realbrookek confirmed: you are good

[abbey bean @_abbeyjean]

@sup_pup7 that’s when i’ll turn on the waterworks

[abbey bean @_abbeyjean]

doing the dean’s payday rap from community as my next audition monologue