ammar.

a student who just want to play games at his home

[ammar. @_amrhqm]

its been a while since ive expressed something here but yea my studies aint great, lemme rephrase its just bad and i legit just wanna restart again at this point

but on the bright side, at least i found someone who i can happily lean beside and cry off my problems to her :)

[ammar. @_amrhqm]

conflicted.

[ammar. @_amrhqm]

as time goes on i finally realize that ive lost the drive to go for anything rn. before i had someone who constantly made me go for it and grind my ass off but its been a year and little by little it was depleting until it was finished.

i was naive to think i can do it alone.

[ammar. @_amrhqm]

bro thinks hes with ronaldo throughout his entire journey even tho the man doesnt even know him😭

[TCR. @TeamCRonaldo]

We weren’t in the MLS at 35

Hope this helps.

[Fabrizio Romano @FabrizioRomano]

🚨 BREAKING: Zlatan Ibrahimović has now decided to retire from professional football with immediate effect.

Incredible player, incredible icon. 🦁👋🏻

[ammar. @_amrhqm]

ive never been so happy and disbelief at the same time.

[ammar. @_amrhqm]

from the bottom of my heart, i still wanna be friends with you. i really do. but your close minded self are making this much worse than it is.

please, for once, lets have a friendly talk and settle our differences. i dont care about how long its going to take, i will ask again.

[ammar. @_amrhqm]

idk how i slept, when i slept, what dream did i watch, why did i i woke up with just two hours of sleep

this was probably my most questionable sleept ive experienced in a while

[ammar. @_amrhqm]

its been two months and i think ive got myself back bit by bit. and i think i finally have the courage to finally talk to her and make everything right.

i just need the right time and opportunity.

[ammar. @_amrhqm]

while im getting back on my toes again i can still feel my heart ache when i remember even the slightest detail of the incident

because i know it isnt a finished business yet i really wanna end it right now

[ammar. @_amrhqm]

i have many addictions that many people dont know about. i keep it private because i dont want anybody to know what sort of a real person am i behind this fun looking facade.

these addictions have terrorised me for my whole life that its going to make my life a living hell.

[ammar. @_amrhqm]

im getting better from time to time, slowly accepting the cruel fact that i had to face for the past month even though i dont want to

but right now im facing the consequences of my actions caused by my own depression and it aint helping

[ammar. @_amrhqm]

i really do miss the old days of my cheerful self. even with all of those bad incidents especially during 2019 i still went through it as if nothing had happened with the support of my friends.

now, im a shadow of my old self. struggling to make it right and now living in pain.

[ammar. @_amrhqm]

every time i want to go to class i have a moment of existential crisis. maybe because of fear that it might go wrong for me or just some me being am introvert idfk.

its hard when you have these kind of moments and you dont know how to solve it. i need to get around it somehow.

[ammar. @_amrhqm]

this week felt like a month and i felt it in both ways

i felt that a month has passed by even though its just a week but at the same time it has been so slow it really felt like a month

my time perception is fcked up to the point where i cant differentiate between slow and fast

[ammar. @_amrhqm]

i dont understand why people want to care about me when i myself dont give a fuck to try and care for myself.

why didnt you even bother to care about me when i still have the courage to care about myself. now im here without any future in mind and dont give two shits about it.

[ammar. @_amrhqm]

kinda funny that im now one of the people targeted for mischievous behaviors. havent been to classes for more than a week has myself a bad reputation.

its hard since my stamina had already gone to ease my mental issues. ive never had a good rest for months.

[ammar. @_amrhqm]

my mind is fully blocked. ive never felt this hard to learn anything new. even with playing games that i like that i struggled to even learn something new about it.

dont worry, one step at a time. you can do this.

[ammar. @_amrhqm]

ive lived long enough to see myself in their position. the overwhelming stress will get to u eventually and without support you're gonna fall. its devastating but its my reality now. (2/2)

[ammar. @_amrhqm]

before, seeing people didnt want to study made me confused, "why they dont wanna study for the hardest exam of their life?"

now, ive fully understand their pov but in the worst way possible. ive understand why they mostly smoking and shit and didnt give any fucks about it. (1/2)