Actually this is a “class action” I can get behind on my own dime. I’ll have a team do some preliminary research and if we decide to pursue, I’ll give an update. We need more public interest litigation.
I know a number of people who didn’t marry their “spec” but are in the healthiest marriages I know. Their spec was typically whatever was culturally deemed to be at the apex of the attractiveness pyramid when they were growing up. For a lot of guys in my generation, it was the music video “vixens” from the late 90s/early 2000s Hip & R&B music videos with ‘coke bottle figures’ and or light skinned eurocentric features. When it’s time to find a partner for the very serious endeavor of sharing a life with, that “spec” is simply inadequate as a measure of compatibility and that’s understandable. The foolishness though is communicating it as though their partner somehow didn’t measure up to their “spec” instead of simply admitting that the idea of their spec was stupid all along and a young boy’s lack of wisdom of what makes a good life partner.
Communicating publicly or even privately to your partner that they weren’t your spec to begin with may seem harmless, after-all you’re just being honest. But subconsciously, it’s an ego trip for you who “settled” and for your the partner, it’s a chip they will always carry on their shoulder that to you, they aren’t quite enough. They’re missing something you had always longed for, so much so that you still consider it to be your “spec”. It’s an unnecessary mind fuck and a cruel thing to say about somebody who is sharing a life with you. No matter how flowery you are with the compliments that come after. You’ve already knocked them down several pegs.
If the point is to say your spec changed then talk about the stupidity of having a spec to begin with. Because I’ve never heard anyone in these situations talk about character attributes being their spec, it’s always superficial stuff. Or speak about how meeting your partner opened your eyes to what true beauty is. Speak in ways that elevate and affirm your partner.
I hope we’re also including the unnecessary hyper-sexualized content Nigerian creators keep making in the name of comedy in these Olodo Uprising/core conversations, because that needs to go too.
i do not think nigerians are morally superior or anything but if nigerians were to ever act like this to foreigners today, there’d be a lot more nigerians decrying and rallying against it. but there’s a silence on this issue by south africans that implies tacit support.
This reminds me of a movie I watched on AM Yorùbá, earlier this year. Story was so triggering that I had to message the producer and share my thoughts. As expected, she never responded till date.
The enabling culture in most Nollywood movies is deeply unfortunate.
VIDEO: Principal of the abducted school children in Oyo begs for help as she says they have been under the sun and rain for the past 2 weeks.
This is incredibly sad that citizens are having to beg for help while the APC government threatens to arrest people for cybercrime.
i hear you but with the way nigeria is set up currently, i think good behaviour + doing the right thing needs to be overly rewarded, even if it’s just as a way to nudge other people to that path.
Amaka went to get pads. She wanted to get 3. Then she checked her purse, looked at the price tag, and did the math. She could only afford 1. Last month, she could afford 3 packs. Today, only a single pack.
You cannot rehabilitate a person that beheads a person.
You cannot rehabilitate someone that offs people for sport.
You cannot rehabilitate someone that kidnaps and rapes children.
I’m the only one who knows what God did for me with THE BOY WHO GAVE🥺
From running out of home and 21, hungry, broke, squatting with friends, to finally raising funds to make and release my first movie. Omo, you’d never know until you’ve walked this path. Thank you Jesus.
Even with strangulating showtimes and zero marketing budget, God is still selling his film.
Thank you to everyone who believed enough to come out these past days to watch THE BOY WHO GAVE. Everyone who has talked about how great of a film it is… thank you! I’m so grateful.
This is only the beginning… unless they kill My God!
Please come out this new week to watch The Boy Who Gave! Thank you. I love you ❤️
#AllisonTheLight