Hali Ballantyne

the sun never sets on a badass

[𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖_𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @SundaeDivine]

Me yelling “pick a direction!” at a squirrel in the road is probably exactly how God feels watching me make a decision.

[𝕭𝖎𝖗𝖉𝖞 @mary_got_grace]

I wish you could door dash people knuckle sandwiches

[kiesha @kiesha9i]

I keep my cats indoors because one of them is just a sweet little guy who needs to be protected from the world, and the other would commit crimes

[phoenix @luckyphoeniix]

“one of you will betray me tonight” was an insane thing for jesus to say at dinner likeeeee??? he really was the og housewife

[stef @meritforsadness]

I knew I was born to be a yearner when I related to Here Without You by 3 Doors Down as a twelve year old.

[Degen CPA @DrewVento]

Dudes will ask where the bitches at but never look within

[JP @jpbrammer]

the phrase "lipstick on a pig" has always inspired a deep sadness in me. I think of the pig, looking forward to her big night out, and I bring myself to the verge of tears.

[Richard Harris @RichHarris2]

Remember always that you’re completely new every day.

[Tots @dumbface5000]

Gotta take a workplace violence training course at work, v excited to learn how to fight my coworkers

[jamexx ✩ @hrstnvrgrwngp]

9 year old me when avril lavigne said
"hell yeah i'm the motherfucking princess"

[𐌁𐌉Ᏽ 𐌕𐌉𐌌𐌉 @OrevaZSN]

I don’t want to be dramatic, but the work week continuously restarting is literally ruining my life.

[law dog, esq. @ggooooddddoogg]

i’ve never seen a cybertruck parked at the library

[soup🌱 @thrluv]

possible mandela effect here but did the sun used to have sunglasses

[Isaiah Martin @isaiahrmartin]

Reminder that Kyle Rittenhouse showed up to a protest like this and Republicans called him a hero

[Desus MF Nice💯 @desusnice]

growing up i never thought i'd ever see the fifa peace prize desecrated like this

[ali @probablyalissa]

We are the granddaughters of the grandmas you couldn’t run over with reindeers

[More Perfect Union @MorePerfectUS]

BREAKING: Instacart is ending all price testing on its platform in the wake of this report.

[tara @proletarat]

Erika Kirk looks like that because she has Botox in her glabella and forehead so the only expressions she can make involve widening and narrowing her eyes like a crazy person lmao

[mitra @mitrajoy_]

three wise men? I highly doubt that

[viviana 🫀 @chipilonita]

i don’t think there’s a difference between a router snd a modem i think yall are just trying to confuse beautiful women