brent

phenomenology appreciator. founder. dancer. chop & carry.

[brent @_brentbaum]

hi

[brent @_brentbaum]

i get excited then sit to read when cookie carver has a new long post https://t.co/KI9I5IYpA6

[cookie🍪 @cookiecarver]

week long tai chi retreat reflections (23rd - 30th May 2026)

on the train to a quaint english town, i reread the diary entries i wrote every night during my last week-long tai chi retreat. i thought about doing the same thing this year but decided against it. i wanted to do something different. the retreat felt different already. different location, different people, different theme. the theme was soong, relaxation within your structure. fewer people were coming this year since for the first time there were no single rooms. everyone had to share

last year i got the blessing from my sifu to teach tai chi. this year i'm teaching 11 or 12 classes a week, depending on if i have to substitute, with more planned to start soon. i do it full time. it doesn't feel like work. people pay me to do something i would do for free. i think about how miserable i was a few years prior doing something that didn't fit me and how my gut kept telling me there was something better on the other side. my gut was right

i shared a room with my tai chi big brother and a senior irish student i see every friday night at training. we wondered who would snore. the irishman claimed he didn't snore but may talk in his sleep. big bro kept quiet about his sleeping habits. i said i snore for the first 15 minutes and stop after that. we would find out quite soon who was stretching the truth. my fellow tai chi buddies were staying together in the other house. two of them were known snorers so they'd put themselves together. i felt bad for the unlucky third

this is the second instructor's retreat i've attended. it changed venues this year to a boarding school in harpenden, near luton. it took about an hour and a half to get there from where i live in london. the last place's food was terrible and the staff were difficult. they kept inventing rules and running out of supplies

"they were too rigid" sifu said. my expectations going into the new place were low. it turned out much better than i imagined! walking the grounds in the new place i thought about what it would be like to be a student here: the independence, the school lunches, the rolling green field and trees everywhere

i saw many familiar faces on the first day. the dedicated irish contingent who come every retreat. the lithuanian gang. cantonese uncle jim who does a ton of chi kung. the tree hugging guy that i am now friends with and train with every saturday, and the german girl, the youngest person there. german girl and i have become friends since last year she ended up moving to london for school. i'm glad to see her. she returns an umbrella i lent her months ago. it had been so long ago i'd forgotten i had given it to her

every morning i woke up between 5 and 5:45am. mostly without an alarm. the sun would rise and light up the thin curtains and that was enough. i'd go out to the rolling green, the same spot every morning, a large oak tree with a stump beside it that became a table for my bag and water bottle. i greeted the tree before i started. i faced the sun and did my standing meditation for an hour

i was always the first one there but as the week went on more and more people gathered around the oak tree. it was smack bang in the middle of a line of trees facing the green so it was a natural meeting point for people standing in silence at 6am. i said goodbye to the tree when i left

for the entire week there was a heatwave in england. the sports hall was concrete brick, with no air conditioning, and retained heat from the previous days like a storage heater. after the long form my t-shirt was soaked. i hadn't brought enough shorts. i would've done tai chi in a swimsuit if it was allowed. it already looked like i'd just got out of a pool

when it got too hot we moved outside under the shade of the big trees in hopes of a gentle breeze. when we were inside there were unspoken negotiations for the spots closest to the fire exits on the off chance of getting some air

every full day was 10 hours of training. 6am to 10pm, with a two hour break at each meal. the food was genuinely good. i couldn't believe the school kids here ate this well: salad bar, freshly prepared hot meals that changed daily, and homemade desserts. last year i told myself one dessert a day. this year i got dessert at pretty much every meal. sometimes i'd agree to split with a buddy and when they came back with the portion i said "oh that's kinda small..." they didn't let me forget i said this. half a dessert really was the perfect amount of dessert. i would just forget after every meal

we ate a lot. we drank a lot. the heat was relentless and it was all leaking out of us. the rooms were saunas. the only relief was cold showers in the communal areas. some people migrated to the common room to sleep since it was cooler. two of the known snorers were so loud the first night their roommate left for the common room. the next day when they took their afternoon nap in the common room they decided to just stay there at night too. the poor guy had escaped them once and they followed him. he ended up with a private room by accident. it was hot but at least it was quiet

you may wonder what someone does when they do 10 hours of tai chi training in a single day. if you come to a week long tai chi retreat the spirit is willing but the body may not be. we do our standing meditation for an hour in the morning and then again later for 30 minutes. we do meditation posture corrections. we do form practice, form corrections, form testing. sensitivity training in the form of push hands, martial applications, and just pushing each other up and down the hall or into mats to wake each other up. we push each other into walls to strengthen our backs, into each other's shoulders, stomachs, chests and arms to build internal power. very old school type of training

the days go slow at first and then fast. around day 3 you usually hit the wall. when you get over it and get a second wind time speeds up. i didn't really hit a wall this year. i wondered if teaching so many classes has made me more resilient. a senior practitioner said it felt slightly easier than usual this year. maybe it was

i was tired some days but not dead tired. just a bit sleep deprived. after we finished at 10pm i'd go to the common room to chat with sifu and the gang and we'd stay up til 1am. some nights i had to tap out. the nights i stayed were worth it. sifu talked about his tai chi journey, old masters, stories from china. things i want to write down properly before they fade

one of the stories sifu told us was when they were on a china trip to foshan. foshan is known for its martial arts. if you're into southern chinese martial arts it's a place of pilgrimage. sifu was there with some senior students and they got invited to a martial arts event. they assumed it was casual so they came late in shorts and flip flops. what greeted them was tai chi masters in silk robes and full formal attire. sifu, being the humble master he is, declined when they asked if he'd like to do push hands with the other masters

"let the students play" he said so the students played. they beat all the foshan students easily. to save face, the foshan master pulled sifu out of his chair. there's a kind of invisible politics in tai chi. when masters meet, they already know. you hand someone a cup of tea and in that exchange the picture is clear. you go to dinner and by the end both parties know who settles the bill. you don't need to fight. you've already fought

the foshan master, in pulling sifu out of that chair, had already told everyone in the room that he didn't know. or maybe he did know but was a bit deluded. he needed to save face somehow. sifu had to oblige when this happened

during their push hands demonstration he applied a scary amount of pressure with his arms, steel wrapped in cotton as the saying goes. the foshan master had to constantly step back to reduce pressure. getting frustrated, he shoved sifu's arms away and came at him with a punch. sifu sensed it, swept the arms aside, and put single whip right up to the master's face. it was over...

...and it was all on video. the whole affair was recorded from every possible angle with a phone. sifu showed us a few clips. it looked like a scene from a film. single whip, the most iconic tai chi move used to end it all. very poetic and also kinda comedic. sifu said he automatically did it and also he would have let the master save face if he stopped at any point but i think secretly he was satisfied that master got humbled

when i eventually went to bed apparently i snored. i think it was the exhaustion. but my big bro snored louder. he said to wake him if it got bad but i couldn't do that. i'd sit up when he sounded like a hibernating bear, think about going to the common room, and just as i was about to get up he'd stop. our irish roommate slept like a mouse. never talked in his sleep. if he had he'd probably be swearing at us

i was supposed to take notes every day but i looked at last year's and it was all the same things: more intention, relax more, stop holding. stuff the mind knows but the body doesn't. what got me this year was how much further those things go. how much more relaxed you can actually be. i felt the chest of one of the teachers during the week and it melted in my palm. there are levels i haven't come close to yet

soong: relaxation within the structure. too relaxed and you go floppy like a fish which is no good. too rigid and you tense up which is also no good. there's always a dance to find the middle. to find the perfect soong structure that may or may not exist

during the late nights sifu told us about tai chi structure, how true tai chi is structureless, how at a certain level it doesn't matter what shape you're in. the form becomes formless. i'm nowhere near that. i still need the structure. i need to know the rules before i break them. but it's good to know there's something to strive for and there are directions to get there

instead of notes i have anecdotes. during training one day i met a bubbly woman who reminded me of my mother. she told me she could read my energy and tell me what animal i am if i stare into her eyes. i was curious so i stared into her warm eyes. she told me i was a panda. this was suspicious since she was wearing a kung fu panda shirt

i looked at her dubiously but she did the same for the person beside us and said she was a falcon so i guess she wasn't just telling everyone they were a panda. i told her i could try do the same for her. she reminded me of a motherly lioness and i told her so. she was delighted. apparently someone else had said the same thing. maybe i have the gift too

one of the late nights someone suggested we go around feeling each other's forearms, wrists, tendons. in tai chi it's not big muscles you're after, it's big tendons, spongey wrists and forearms. mine need work but apparently my tendons are larger than average. i'll take it. another night, people were asking sifu silly questions like "can you do tai chi in space?" (yes) or "can you do dynamic push hands with a tree" (no)

on wednesday most of the senior students wore a yellow shirt and when i asked one of them why they were all wearing yellow shirts he just said "it's yellow shirt wednesday!" and walked off. i had no idea what that meant but apparently it's a tradition from previous retreats from someone who was really into his yellow shirts. sadly he passed away so they are carrying on the tradition. i'll be sure to remember to bring a yellow shirt next year

jim, the cantonese uncle i met early on when i moved to london, was at the retreat. he told me my arms are feeling heavier but i moved lightly which is a good sign. jim has been doing this a long time. so long that i'm afraid to ask. i think of him as mr zhan zhuang since he does so much of it. i told him i'm heavier because i stand on the tube for four hours a day. he said good, keep it up. i'm happy my secret tube training is paying off

during sifu's closing speech he talked about yuanfen, fate, how things that are meant to happen will happen. how we're all in this room because of tai chi, how you need to be nurtured to grow. i think about the relationships built up over the years and how strange it is that tai chi drew us here. i try not to think too hard about it. i'm in a river on a boat. i have a paddle and i can go left or right to avoid things but at the end of the day i stay afloat at the mercy of the current

on the train back i sit with the german girl. she has strong intention in her eyes. stronger than mine. i tell her about the late night stories and the time passes fast. i think about how during partner work i couldn't push her over. we are the youngest ones at the retreat. we are the next generation. i will train hard to pass the art to the next generation

i sleep early when i get home. i don't feel tired anymore. i feel revitalised. there's a lot of work to do and i'm just getting started

[brent @_brentbaum]

@mossing_pdf i like mine with smiley faces - doesn’t matter if they’re drawn with butter or powdered sugar or avacado slices

[brent @_brentbaum]

@BademusGwilym @RomeoStevens76 weekly, don’t get cucked by mutations idiot

[brent @_brentbaum]

@DylanisnotGreek @RomeoStevens76 but actually……….

[brent @_brentbaum]

@WarnerTeddy @RichDecibels i think we have to do this legally

[brent @_brentbaum]

@Mareikehere yes let’s talk (we have so much to talk about)

[brent @_brentbaum]

@michaeltong_ ohhh let’s talk. i’ll be in berlin mid july to august, would want to overlap there or at tilo. i also know you’re playing w limited vacation for now!

[brent @_brentbaum]

@daemonhugger i guess i could share the title ;)

[brent @_brentbaum]

@michaeltong_ ahhhh wish i could be there. would be curious for a set list or recording if you end up w one

[brent @_brentbaum]

@indybuddhist @TVachaW i like your theory zen! and take it as a definition, and a good one (with respect)

[brent @_brentbaum]

@simon_ohler @RichDecibels this would be incredibly blessed. rich can i bug you about this and sit with you to block off the calendar week together?

[nibras ꩜ @heynibras]

as far as effective, transformative inner work goes, this is the whole thing. these are the 3 ‘skills’

being able to put attention in the body & stay is the foundation. learning to ‘do nothing’ is the other end of the spectrum

everything else transformative is relational/outer

[brent @_brentbaum]

@blissbrah @lukechampine how do i fund this

[Delicious Tacos @Delicious_Tacos]

“It’s my honor to announce that the true pope is working with us from Avignon”

[Pope Leo XIV @Pontifex]

In the era of #ArtificialIntelligence, when human dignity is threatened by new forms of dehumanization, ours is the pressing duty to remain profoundly human. We must lovingly safeguard the grandeur of humanity bestowed upon us and revealed in its fullness in Christ, the splendor of which no machine can ever replace. #MagnificaHumanitas
https://t.co/6i9MWs6LJl

[Pope Leo XIV @Pontifex]

Humanity, created by God in all its grandeur, is today facing a pivotal choice: either to construct a new Tower of Babel or to build the city in which God and humanity dwell together. In Jesus Christ, this humanity in its grandeur becomes the Way, the Truth and the Life, opening the path for each of us to grow toward fullness. #MagnificaHumanitas
https://t.co/6i9MWs6LJl

[brent @_brentbaum]

yeah he's... a lot.

start w/ claude:
/office-hours for business decisions where i need a conversation partner
/plan-ceo-review and /plan-eng-review for feature speccing and implementation plans
then i have codex implement the feature
/qa usually finds a couple real bugs after that

his /design-review skill is nice but claude design took its place for me. i'll run claude design after i have codex's initial implementation, usually before qa, for a subset of features.

the /browse skill is useful in conjuction with /setup-browser-cookies, especially to unblock /qa when i need agents to interact with external systems

his skills have a lot of non-obvious best practices built in (ask the model to use diagrams -> simplifies model's thought, keep a feedback log for all skills when I correct and use that to improve the skill over time, ask codex for a second opinion at the end of any workflows to find edge cases, etc)

it's a good fit for a very particular type of engineering but i'm a 1 person cto tech team for a product growing / expanding at a reasonable clip, so it's solid