local sparkling water snob

[seiya @systole_]

every spring it feels like i’m living life again for the first time

[𝚃𝚑𝚒𝚌𝚌 𝙲𝚑𝚞𝚗𝚐𝚞𝚜 🍄 @anactualwalnut]

I know this has been said a million times in a million different ways, but it genuinely is so FUCKING insane that we are now fully aware our government is filled with child trafficker murderer rapist pedophiles and we all just wake up in the morning and go to work and pay our bills and are filing our taxes to pay a government full of fucking child trafficker murder rapist pedophiles. Every day I feel like I’m inching closer to a full manic episode and I’m not being dramatic or funny this shit is not okay or normal what the fuck are we even doing anymore bro

[𝟮𝟭.🛸 @Big_tagg]

I DO NOT “MEAL PREP” I DO NOT “BUDGET GROCERIES” I BUY FOOD WHEN IM HUNGRY AND IF IM BROKE I KILL MYSELF

[｡ﾟ☆ * Em ☽ .* ☆ﾟ @EmileeSilvey]

and for my next boyfriend, i’m gonna try to find one that actually likes me

[STUNNER @Cr7Godbrand]

Glad you’re all starting to understand the purpose of modern feminism.

You work…companies profit from selling baby formula.

You stay single…hotels, restaurants, and airlines make money off you trying to cure loneliness.

You promote divorce…lawyers get rich.

You don’t want to be a stay-at-home wife …daycare owners profit.

You don’t get married…pet companies profit from women adopting cats and dogs.

You delay having children because of your career…employers get richer, and fertility clinics make money later.

Whatever decisions you make, whatever insecurities you display, become part of a billion-dollar business model. Your insecurities and poor choices are profitable investments for corporations.

[Greta @gretaproblems]

My Instagram story emits a frequency that only my ex boyfriends ears can hear

[emi @emisandrist]

dating app men hate me because i looooove no label casual situationship and so unfortunately they dont get the ego boost that comes from driving a woman crazy trying to change them

[lil piss baby @11kmrn]

nightmare blunt rotation:

- me after 5 drinks
- that man i dated at 19
- bi awakening situationship
- ex friend
- me at 18

[🍀 @dreapostedthatt]

i done felt every 29 days of January, every single one

[g @34rths]

I am in a perpetual state of worry and I have the nervous system of a Chihuahua but I keep thinking that Everything will eventually work out for me in the end

[‏۟ @crashmymind]

i guess being with me is difficult but lusting over me is so fucking simple

[jbolina jolie @pastapilled]

(8 months post break up) AND ANOTHER THING

[‏ً @BALUCIAGA]

a gmail account i’ve had since high school suddenly doesn’t have any space anymore and wants a monthly subscription? yeah, okay.

[𝐵𝑎𝑏𝑦 𝐾 @misskerrington]

my type can’t even be explained... u just gotta be him

[Soleil @soleiljolina]

January is one of those months where you experience every feeling on the human spectrum and you just have to go about your day like it isn’t happening

[fleur @bugfleur]

rapidly switching between freaking the fuck out and feeling like im the coolest, most desirable, most self actualized girl in the world

[t. @thandoau]

girl, if you are trying to up your sexy and whimsy, you have to start dancing and stretching. all those stored emotions need a channel for release. put on your favorite album and start dancing in front of a mirror as often as possible.

[dede @derinmama]

sometimes i shed tears at the accuracy of my intuition because there are times i want to be wrong so bad

[DeeDee - ADHD Helper @DopaminePlsMe]

The cruelest ADHD realization is that planning the hobby gives me 100% of the dopamine, while doing the hobby gives me 0%.

I didn't actually want to knit a scarf.
I wanted to buy $80 of yarn, watch a tutorial, and fantasize about being a "knitter" for an afternoon.

The fantasy was the finished product