Crisp

here for a bad time, not a long time

[Crisp @_millertimeusa]

finally realized that everyone who said I would love bojack horseman was insulting me when I watched it and found out it’s about a depressed loser who thinks he’s hot shit

[Jason, ex Inferis @benedictsred]

I bet doom scroll meant something way cooler in the middle ages.

[Bradley Hope @bradleyhope]

🚨 BREAKING: Trump's DOJ just killed its elite anti-corruption unit, our sources say. The Kleptocracy Initiative - famous for seizing Russian oligarchs' yachts and prosecuting the $4.5B 1MDB fraud - was quietly disbanded last night.

[Crisp @_millertimeusa]

the way this would be playing nonstop on fox for six months if it was biden

[More Perfect Union @MorePerfectUS]

Video continued:

" You take an airplane, it costs you 2 dollars."

[Brooks Otterlake @i_zzzzzz]

I pray that a Chinese lab never makes a slightly better version of me

[Scoob @Scoobydouchebag]

Happy Large Boulder The Size of a Small Boulder Day to those who celebrate

[madimoiselle ♡ @drivingmemadi]

Being super smug about the TikTok ban not affecting me because I waste 8 hours on my phone in other superior ways

[. @illiam_william]

Oh that plane was HOOPING

[sam @sam_d_1995]

@2AvSagas republicans when people evade fares on the subway 🤬

republicans when people evade fares in their car 😍

[crust bucket @eeeosburn]

If ur not drinking 13 beers with me I can only assume ur drinking 13 beers against me

[manny @mannyfidel]

watching MADAME WEB on my flight, why won't she open this fucking pepsi can i can't breathe

[Sickos Committee @SickosCommittee]

I will honour the Pop-Tarts Bowl in my heart, and try to keep it all the year. I will live in the Past, the Present, and the Future. The Spirits of Cinnamon Roll and Strawberry shall strive within me. I will not shut out the lessons that they teach.

[Pop-Tarts Bowl @PopTartsBowl]

He is risen! #PopTartsBowl

[Posts Of Cats @PostsOfCats]

Meet Indiana Bones, the museum cat that parades around after hours ruling over all the bones at the Museum of Osteology

[summer 🖕 @salesforcechild]

me to my 4 year old son: i just got off the phone with santa and he is so angry about what you did that i am genuinely afraid for your life. we need to put you in hiding because at this point i think he would even kill me to get to you.

[T.C.P. @techceopepe]

I’d like to see a Large Language Model try to get as drunk as I did yesterday.

[Keara Sullivan @superkeara]

Me at 11yrs old hearing Airplanes ft. Hayley Williams for the first time

[Alex Shephard @alex_shephard]

and they said we should be worried about the disappearance of literary men

[Crisp @_millertimeusa]

getting your silverware REALLY clean by sanitizing it in the microwave >>>