Austin Schmidt

[Austin Schmidt @aScHmIdT4]

"Blake stick your balls in this batch, we'll call it Asian Zing" @BWAKEthomas

[Austin Schmidt @aScHmIdT4]

#NHL17Tarsenko

[Austin Schmidt @aScHmIdT4]

Adolph Oliverbush

[Austin Schmidt @aScHmIdT4]

When your little cousin asks why your gamer tag is 69... #itsmyfavoritenumber #shetoldmygrandma

[Austin Schmidt @aScHmIdT4]

@fickert_brendan I'm deprived and only get channel 5 in my room

[Because I'm a Guy @CauseWereGuys]

#MyFutureChild

[Austin Schmidt @aScHmIdT4]

@_Boyer_ did u call the fire department?

[Because I'm a Guy @CauseWereGuys]

When girls get drunk vs when guys get drunk https://t.co/U6ex84kDdN

[Austin Schmidt @aScHmIdT4]

Cops found human skull by my house in the creek. Neat

[Dan Bilzerian @DanBilzerian]

Current mood

[Because I'm a Guy @CauseWereGuys]

How to win an argument

[Jordan @KingBeck22]

Need a flag football league to be in!

[Austin Schmidt @aScHmIdT4]

"@Manstagram_: NOICE http://t.co/yZm5dv00mG" @dylanjohnson_3_ @BWAKEthomas

[Austin Schmidt @aScHmIdT4]

Hey grandpa were u surprised? "Is the pope catholic" #budquote

[Austin Schmidt @aScHmIdT4]

I was gonna make a gay joke... But fuck it

[Because I'm a Guy @CauseWereGuys]

"Don't fall don't fall" http://t.co/0I4v2sXjVK

[Because I'm a Guy @CauseWereGuys]

Do you ever bring your pet up to a mirror and you are just like
“that is you”