Abigail Sims

keep your pants on

[Abigail Sims @abilouisesims]

This kid comes barreling into the theatre, sees the reclining seats and says in the voice of my father “now THIS is luxury”

[Cher @cher]

Sorry Been MIA,
What IS My Problem

[Max @Juicewag]

I wish I was executed after birth

[Abigail Sims @abilouisesims]

when someone asks me how i'm going to make my next film:
"i have a concept of a plan"

[Abigail Sims @abilouisesims]

in all fairness, i would also go to a sorority party instead of meeting Netanyahu

[twitch.tv/yolandafister @yolandafister]

the aliens after their transgender operations

[Abigail Sims @abilouisesims]

WE NEED WALLS, AND WE HAVE TO HAVE IT

[Abigail Sims @abilouisesims]

THEYRE EATING THE PETS??????

[Abigail Sims @abilouisesims]

you've got a friend in me? get your friend out of me!
send

[Abigail Sims @abilouisesims]

one of the places i feel the absolute safest is any small family owned smog check center with an armenian man running the show

[Maddie Sloan @maddieeesloan]

She’s so real for that

[Abigail Sims @abilouisesims]

@maddieeesloan MADDIE !!!!

[Molly P @molllypea]

THATS MY BEST FRIEND WITH THE PRETZELS!!!!!!!!!!

[Abigail Sims @abilouisesims]

Accidentally drove through a river tonight and I opened my mouth but the voice of my father came out saying “do not stop this car keep going keep going keep going keep going” AND I DID

[Abigail Sims @abilouisesims]

@Likethedr1nk Are you KIDDING ME????

[Abigail Sims @abilouisesims]

@molllypea thank you so much for coming

[Abigail Sims @abilouisesims]

@Likethedr1nk i’m obsessed

[Abigail Sims @abilouisesims]

Joe Jonas reveals Sophie Turner wouldn’t tell him how the weather was up there, TMZ reports

[Abigail Sims @abilouisesims]

so hard to tell if the weird guy is just tweeting weird things or if he’s been hacked

[Abigail Sims @abilouisesims]

bring the chopped onions back !!!!
this is not a bit
@Dodgers @Dodgers @Dodgers

[Abigail Sims @abilouisesims]

@molllypea the JOY