I AM RAGHAV

Standup comedian. Co-host of @PodDamnAmerica. Leader of MS-13.

[I AM RAGHAV @ACLUOfficial]

Ok but how do we know Penis CK isn’t just a Martin Urbano character

[I AM RAGHAV @ACLUOfficial]

@conner_mcnutt do you wanna do March 15th 2028?

[I AM RAGHAV @ACLUOfficial]

@ShaqKatzner I manage my anxiety with bouts of depression

[I AM RAGHAV @ACLUOfficial]

I must confess that my father paid $40k in bitcoin, so I could be accepted into the School of Hard Knocks

[I AM RAGHAV @ACLUOfficial]

@behindyourback It’s very good!

[I AM RAGHAV @ACLUOfficial]

In that she’s good at what she does sometimes but every other thing she says is aggressively tone-deaf or plain stupid

[I AM RAGHAV @ACLUOfficial]

Nancy Pelosi is Lena Dunham of Congress

[Luke Savage @LukewSavage]

Thanks to the good folks @facebook for demonstrating that they are, indeed, a monopoly that exercises unwarranted, undemocratic power and needs to be broken up https://t.co/Qfp7MUCrNK

[Randall Otis @RandallOtisTV]

Cory Booker has theater kid energy

[I AM RAGHAV @ACLUOfficial]

It sucks that you can't plead insanity anywhere besides a court room

[I AM RAGHAV @ACLUOfficial]

@jazzslaysdinos look I don't like going into work sometimes ok

[I AM RAGHAV @ACLUOfficial]

Me: I think Todd hates me. Well, I hate Todd. Fuck him.

*Todd likes single Instagram post*

Me: Todd is a light in this grim hellscape we live inside. I marvel at our blossoming friendship and look forward to the years of mirth and camaraderie to come. Praise Todd.

[I AM RAGHAV @ACLUOfficial]

A lot of otherwise smart people can have really dumb political beliefs and it’s because they over-personalize politics opposed to seeing a policy helps the broader public and I’m just glad I don’t do this. Anyway, I think my aunt should be President.

[I AM RAGHAV @ACLUOfficial]

@BrandonEsWolf @drewjanda it IS crazy!

[I AM RAGHAV @ACLUOfficial]

@mediocreventure man watches Hairspray once and redirects his entire life

[I AM RAGHAV @ACLUOfficial]

When I was 9 my parents picked me up after school in a U-Haul van and told me we were moving and never gave an explanation. During my teens I was convinced my dad was on the run from the law but later I realized he's just an impulsive weirdo who really wanted to live in Baltimore

[I AM RAGHAV @ACLUOfficial]

@KrangTNelson there needs to be a Caddyshack reboot starring Trump and in the end he dies in a way that is both horrific and very funny

[Briahna Joy Gray @briebriejoy]

He did.

[I AM RAGHAV @ACLUOfficial]

@LordBobbyConner Thx bb

[I AM RAGHAV @ACLUOfficial]

“Good to be here!”
-Me during sex