alyssa

has bugs / she/her

[alyssa @alyssajaeschmid]

i do not have pink eye!

[tyler oakley @tyleroakley]

looking around at people who still have yet to acknowledge anything going on in the world right now

[alyssa @alyssaraetho]

no he’s not. all you people know is depravity

[alyssa @alyssajaeschmid]

@ryxn888 well why were u at costco at 1pm on a monday ….

[alyssa @alyssajaeschmid]

oppenheimer winning best picture … we’ll have to agree to disagree on that one

[alyssa @alyssajaeschmid]

i’m sorry….. who is upset about john wick ……

[DiscussingFilm @DiscussingFilm]

Major #Oscar misses include:

• No Leonardo DiCaprio or Zac Efron in Best Actor
• No TMNT: Mutant Mayhem in Best Animated Film
• No Greta Lee or Margot Robbie in Best Actress
• No Charles Melton or Willem Dafoe in Best Supporting Actor
• No Rachel McAdams in Best Supporting Actress
• Across The Spider-Verse not in Best Original Score
• The Iron Claw, John Wick 4 & Priscilla got 0 nominations
• No Strange Way of Life in Best Short Film
• Only 2 nominations for Past Lives

See the full nominees list: https://t.co/EfQMNCVa6z

[¢orie @corietjohnson]

I like snoopy but i don’t show it too much cuz i know he’s got a lot of parasocial relationships to deal with already

[alyssa @alyssajaeschmid]

how tf do i get onto tarte island

[alyssa @alyssajaeschmid]

ok but what about the pizza w the pigs in a blanket crust …..

[CNN @CNN]

Pizza Hut is bringing back a fan favorite after a nearly 25-year hiatus.
https://t.co/W4hpfSDRKc

[andrianaシ @BOTTEGAHOENETA]

Snoopy for vogue beauty secrets

[roro, PhD @fuglibetty]

well the sexbots are liking Ur story because they are farming for engagement. but they liked mine because they gained sentience and were immediately overcome with true lustful desire

[helena riley @freshhel]

That big senator is so hot

[alyssa @alyssajaeschmid]

thank you to our troops. for a 3 day weekend

[alyssa @alyssajaeschmid]

only thing better than hearing office gossip is being the one sharing it

[U.S. Postal Service @USPS]

it’s time to ⚠️ bewritingaletter ⚠️

[alyssa @alyssajaeschmid]

the gamification of my diabetes is really working well for me

[pj @pjayevans]

Quentin Tarantino is the perfect name for that freak

[dana donnelly @danadonnelly]

hey. those are my emotional support 42,732 unread emails

[alyssa @alyssajaeschmid]

@griffzales this is cyberbullying!

[alyssa @alyssajaeschmid]

@griffzales im showing him these and he is gonna be really sad :(