Amanda, Not Bynes

24 mf hours of the day, I’m just existing…

[Amanda, Not Bynes @ampanda98]

Occupation: sleepiest girl on the planet

[Amanda, Not Bynes @ampanda98]

I think I just taught myself how to twerk - wild

[Amanda, Not Bynes @ampanda98]

I just realized the company I work for is attacking the insurance agencies with their business strategies these last few years…

[Amanda, Not Bynes @ampanda98]

Subscriptions are the modern variation of insurance…

[Amanda, Not Bynes @ampanda98]

A male coworker (kindly) told me today, he was worried I was leaving because I was dressed so fancy the day before.

Not the empty paper boxes in my cube… my attire, he thought I had an interview for something!

“you gotta dress for the job you want… not the job you have”

[Amanda, Not Bynes @ampanda98]

Just thinking about how my fiancé and I really are the perfect match for each other! 🥰

[Amanda, Not Bynes @ampanda98]

Watching “Family Guy” while high is actually insane. Truly the wildest, the innuendos are about everybody, yet FOR everybody good or bad.

[Amanda, Not Bynes @ampanda98]

My dog is laying on my lap and realized the most experienced “saying”, like people have and will experience this, is, “silent but deadly” because the scent of my dogs deadly silent toot just reached me…

[Amanda, Not Bynes @ampanda98]

Was adulting fairly well a little while ago and realized I needed milk for something and saw the jug unopened so I poured myself a glass. I knew I was watching Cars so I grabbed our Cars mug.

I am now a 26 y/o watching Cars and drinking milk from a Cars mug… it’s a good day!

[Tiberius @tiberiusfiles]

🎯

[Amanda, Not Bynes @ampanda98]

Garlic with your heart and even when you worry it’s to much, add a little more!

[Amanda, Not Bynes @ampanda98]

Does anyone else have the longest hair of peach fuzz, that you find in the most random place on your body?

[Amanda, Not Bynes @ampanda98]

When people act like I use ranch with everything.

I realized it’s because I was always told “if I didn’t use all the ranch on my plate I wouldn’t get any next time”.

[Amanda, Not Bynes @ampanda98]

I even notice the quality of different store brand plastic water bottles…

Hy-Vee: pretty good quality, the lid is very secure!

Members Mark: pretty decent, lid compared a little weaker feeling

Walmart: trash

[Amanda, Not Bynes @ampanda98]

Am I showing my upbringing by the fact that I can recall being intrigued to get a plastic bottle of water at various activities growing up?

We always had reusable water bottles at my home. To the point we’d get a “nice” plastic water bottle and say ahh we are keeping this.

[Amanda, Not Bynes @ampanda98]

Talking to my sister about my 15 month old nephew, “when he’s a butthead” she says, the fact she called him that is hilarious!

She explains, “when he’s cussing me out in baby babble”… I didn’t realize she could top calling her flesh & blood a butthead!

And she wasn’t joking!

[Amanda, Not Bynes @ampanda98]

Like if at the very least the event gave me a plastic bottle of water, it got a star from me!

[Amanda, Not Bynes @ampanda98]

Grandparents who can be major fixtures in kids memories, but their grandkids don’t see their hard times like their parents did

[Amanda, Not Bynes @ampanda98]

I know in the hard times my fiancé is always worth more than those hard times because when I look at him I see our grandparents and their long standing marriages - I know I chose right!