Amy Green

[Amy Green @amyrgreen]

5yo just asked for a real kitchen, couch, and her own TV for Christmas.

So basically, she's asking for her own apartment already. Cool.

[Amy Green @amyrgreen]

5yo legitimately beat me in Mario Party. Not sure if I should be proud or pissed off.

[Amy Green @amyrgreen]

"Mom, can you teach me to do laundry?"

These must be the most beautiful words that have ever been spoken.

[Amy Green @amyrgreen]

Took all of 19 days before 5 yo got sent to the principal's office. #goals?

[Amy Green @amyrgreen]

4yo just took off his pants in the grocery store because he "just​ didn't feel like wearing then anymore"

[Amy Green @amyrgreen]

@RaytownPD What's happening at 6700 block of Harris?

[Amy Green @amyrgreen]

@ryanstraits @paulagreen76 @gederoth oh she does if you specifically ask for those

[Amy Green @amyrgreen]

@allyfairly maybe use celery if you have it for him to chew on? That's what we do and it works well. Either way, hoping you get rest!

[Amy Green @amyrgreen]

4yo is angry bc I don't have real glitter for her to do real magic to help her pretend friend Arty with an emergency

[Amy Green @amyrgreen]

Had a pleasant experience at Walmart this morning which just proves miracles do happen

[Amy Green @amyrgreen]

@drewmdaniels but there is no such thing as black Thursday. That just sounds dumb

[Amy Green @amyrgreen]

Entering the ladies restroom on black Friday is comparable to using a NYC public bathroom.. it should have a warning sign. #blackfriday

[Amy Green @amyrgreen]

Quickest way to check out at Target: be sure your 3yo is screaming so loud the manager opens a special line just for you

[Amy Green @amyrgreen]

Still waiting for that extra hour of sleep...

[Amy Green @amyrgreen]

Voting this morning felt like filling out the most important Scantron of my life.#Election2016

[Amy Green @amyrgreen]

Now let's talk about how even though Zobrist is MVP while playing for the Cubs, he was a Royal for like ten minutes

[Amy Green @amyrgreen]

[insert all the posts/stats about Zobrist winning two series back to back here]

[Amy Green @amyrgreen]

I love baseball

[Amy Green @amyrgreen]

Meanwhile over at #ChicagoScanner

[Amy Green @amyrgreen]

Float it