Last night I was up from 1 AM to 7 AM doing emergency surgeries.
I’m tired.
A few years back, I would have been angry and frustrated that I didn’t get any sleep.
But to my surprise, last night was full of peace.
I’m a long ways off, but God has done something profound in me.
He’s taught me to be content in all circumstances.
The ups and downs of life don’t toss me like waves anymore.
And it’s because of one thing: I’m starting to live for His glory, not my own life.
Bad days are now an opportunity to depend on Him and respond to life in a way that brings Him glory.
This is the power of the gospel.
This is what it means to be free.
This is what Jesus can do for you.
A great misunderstanding is the idea that compassion does not allow for consequences.
“If I feel sympathy for your plight, I must not hold you to account for your wrongdoing.”
It is a worldview that perpetuates suffering through permissiveness.
Sometimes the consequences ARE the compassion.
I get being tired
I get being overwhelmed
I get having a lack of help
I get the hormone shifts
I get the despair
I do not get how that leads you to “Same, Lindsay”
I think a lot of women need to hear this, so I'll say it even though I'm going to get shredded.
You're not Lindsay Clancy. You're not, and you don't have to believe you are to defend your own experience with PPD. You don't have to defend her to defend yourself. I know you think you do, but you don't. You're not her.
It's evil to murder your children. It's not evil to be in the deep, horrific dark postpartum and hear evil voices telling you to do horrible things, and there's a LOT more distance between those two places than you think, in your fear watching this case, thinking you could have been her.
I know maybe you think you barely made it through your first postpartum or second. She was in her third, and maybe you think that's when you'll crack too. You won't. You think she tried everything to get help, and you're terrified what would happen if you tried to get help and couldn't. I need you to hear this: she was an L&D nurse. She knew exactly what she would have had to say to get her kids safe, and she did not. She said a lot of things, but she didn't say what she knew would have gotten her more then just more drugs. And she made the choice to take those drugs at those doses, when she had enough medical knowledge to know better.
Lindsay made choices.
EVEN IF you fight the exact same level of PPD and PPP (rare) that she did, YOU ARE NOT HER because you did and you will go to your husband and your doctor and say "I am hearing a voice that says do these specific things to my kids. I'm afraid they are not safe with me. You have to remove me from them." And they will do that.
You are not Lindsay Clancy.
I'll tell you something shameful since you read this far. Last year after my second, I was hearing that voice saying cut yourself cut yourself cut yourself. Over and over every night until I did. Just barely. And as soon as put a red mark on my arm, not even drawing blood, I knew how extremely stupid it was and how much I didn't want to do it. I got some help, and I know I'll never do anything like that again, much less hurt my kids. I'm not Lindsay. You're not Lindsay.
But I know why you're scared it could have been you. I know why you think you have to defend her. And I know you're out here just needing to talk about it and hear these things, so here you go. Just sit with me and breathe for a minute. You're not her, and you need to believe that.
“[We live] in hope of eternal life, which God, who never lies, promised before the ages began.” Titus 1:2
The whole plan conceived and secured before the universe existed.
One of hardest things to remember as Christians is that you shouldn’t do the right thing because it’s right.
You should do the right thing because you love God and others.
If you remove the relational element, it’s automatically self serving and religious.
🇻🇪🙏 Se reencuentra con su hijo tras pasar 122 horas bajo los escombros:
Un hombre logró reencontrarse con su hijo, quien fue rescatado con vida después de permanecer 122 horas atrapado bajo los escombros del Hotel Eduards, en La Guaira. El edificio colapsó a causa de los terremotos registrados el 24 de junio en Venezuela.
🇻🇪 “Está volviendo a temblar… Si quieres, vete”, le dice un hombre atrapado al rescatista.
El rescatista decide quedarse y le responde con una invitación: “Oremos a Dios”. 🥹🙏🏻