Academic recently diagnosed with “emotional dysregulation possibly 2 to bipolar or EUPD”, an anonymous account to help navigate these interesting times
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Stuck in low-mood, I hate myself, I can’t bear the 50 year old version of myself in the mirror and in other people’s eyes. I feel like I have failed in taking care of myself and have let myself go. Not sure how to get out of this hole #bipolarclub
Been a bit quiet, things have not been good as, I completely overcommitted at work and my anxiety levels went through the roof, so I’ve collected an additional & familiar diagnosis,GAD, & now on escitalopram as well as quetiapine, but on the + I started therapy #bipolarclub
I wish people (also: professionals) would recognise that being ‘high functioning’ doesn’t mean you don’t need help. So many people are denied support or pushed back to primary care who would really benefit from therapy because they have a job or are parents or have social lives.
My anxiety would likely not meet criteria for a CMHT so if I’m too complex for IAPT but not severe enough for CMHT I’ll be in that lovely little mental health services limbo so many of us find ourselves in.
On the positive side I’ve been exercising consistently for over a month and I feel fitter and stronger, and it helps my mood
On the other side work feels like a toxic relationship that I cannot afford to end and the NHS is useless for anything other than meds 🤷🏻♀️
#bipolarclub
Heading to a work away day and feeling incredibly anxious, panicking that I left a door open in the house or a tap on, or the cooker on, even if I checked everything, at least twice, before leaving the house. Keep hoping for an excuse to head back home I guess #bipolarclub