Autumn 🔥

🤡🖥💻⌨️

[Autumn 🔥 @anonymous110489]

@Aje2050981 @instablog9ja Who you dey call men? Stopeet

[Autumn 🔥 @anonymous110489]

@ugandaHott This guy just take em hand subscribe for premium infection services

[Autumn 🔥 @anonymous110489]

@DAMIADENUGA Make them double tap untop person predicament

[Autumn 🔥 @anonymous110489]

@iamChigoo They planned him

[Autumn 🔥 @anonymous110489]

@Postsubman This last one na AI. The others are real

[Autumn 🔥 @anonymous110489]

@Szymansk_ii Abi them lock their toilet comot

[Àlúbàríkà 🇳🇬 @Iyoaiye_]

Laugh zone ni oo😀😀 👇👇👇👇
Desmond Elliot was my classmate at the university. We both studied Economics. He was flamboyant and a young Christian cell leader. He was calm and lovable back then. He also carefully selected his friends, he was never really a man of the people, but of a selected few. I guess that is still how he operates in politics today.

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Gbajabiamila’s Office. Abuja. Closed-door meeting.

Desmond Elliot walks in wearing a spotless white agbada so bright it could direct traffic.

Desmond: “Good afternoon sir. You sent for me?”

Gbajabiamila: “Sit down, Desmond.”

Desmond sits confidently. Crosses leg. Adjusts cap. Smiles like man coming to collect endorsement.

Gbajabiamila leans back.

Gbajabiamila: “How many years have you been in the House of Assembly?”

Desmond: “Twelve years sir. Three solid terms.”

Gbajabiamila: “Excellent. Now tell me… what exactly did you build?”

Desmond freezes.

Desmond: “Sir?”

Gbajabiamila: “Projects, Desmond. Physical things. Things human beings can touch. What did you build?”

Desmond clears throat.

Desmond: “Well sir, I sponsored 11 motions…”

Gbajabiamila: “Can people live inside motions?”

Desmond: “No sir.”

Gbajabiamila: “Continue.”

Desmond: “I also co-sponsored 42 motions…”

Gbajabiamila: “Did any of the motions become a bridge?”

Desmond: “Not exactly sir.”

Gbajabiamila: “Road nko?”

Desmond: “No sir.”

Gbajabiamila: “Hospital?”

Desmond: “No sir.”

Gbajabiamila: “Drainage?”

Desmond: “Sir… technically…”

Gbajabiamila: “Desmond!”

Desmond quickly changes strategy.

Desmond: “Sir I also launched a 198-page book titled My Surulere Journey: Twelve Years of Impact and Strategic Legislative Synergy.”

Gbajabiamila stares at him like NEPA bill.

Gbajabiamila: “So after twelve years… you gave the people homework.”

Silence.

AC temperature suddenly drops.

Gbajabiamila: “From Bank Olemo to Masha to Iponri, the people are complaining.”

Desmond: “Sir opposition propaganda. Sponsored attacks.”

Gbajabiamila: “You said the same thing during the #EndSARS protest.”

Desmond: “Sir that one was misunderstood.”

Gbajabiamila: “And the potholes?”

Desmond: “Natural disaster sir.”

Gbajabiamila rubs forehead.

Gbajabiamila: “Desmond, do you know I personally begged Surulere to accept you in 2015?”

Desmond nods aggressively.

Gbajabiamila: “Obasanjo called Tinubu. Tinubu called me. I called party leaders. Everybody joined hand to package you like Big Brother contestant.”

Desmond: “And I remain forever grateful sir.”

Gbajabiamila: “Grateful for what? You inherited a political mansion and turned it into photo studio. Every project they praise in Surulere today, I built before you arrived. You spent twelve years posting captions.”

Desmond goes quiet.

Very quiet.

Even his agbada looks ashamed.

Desmond softly: “Sir… if I offended anybody in any way whatsoever concerning anything somehow related to everything… I am sorry.”

Gbajabiamila: “You don’t even know what you did wrong.”

Desmond: “Sir I am apologizing in advance and in arrears.”

Another silence.

Gbajabiamila: “I have found your replacement.”

Desmond sits up immediately.

Desmond: “Replacement ke?”

Gbajabiamila: “Her name is Barakat Odunuga-Bakare.”

Desmond blinks twice.

Desmond: “Sir… a woman?”

Gbajabiamila: “Is Surulere allergic to women?”

Desmond: “No sir. I just thought experience would matter.”

Gbajabiamila: “Twelve years of what? Ring light and Instagram captions?”

Desmond nearly chokes.

Desmond: “Sir what happens to my fourth term?”

Gbajabiamila: “What about it?”

Desmond: “Can I still contest?”

Gbajabiamila: “Nigeria is a democracy. Anybody can contest.”

Desmond’s face brightens immediately.

Desmond: “Ah! So I still have your support?”

Gbajabiamila: “Did I say that?”

Desmond: “But you said I can contest.”

Gbajabiamila: “And Manchester United can win Champions League. Both are technically possible.”

Silence.

Painful silence.

Somewhere, a ceiling fan laughs quietly.

[Autumn 🔥 @anonymous110489]

@NigeriaStories Which mumu scorecard? You learnt nothing from your egbon. Your egbon has good track records. You have none

[Autumn 🔥 @anonymous110489]

@instablog9ja This woman is always getting herself into trouble

[Autumn 🔥 @anonymous110489]

@Emmanuel_Tips ══════∩═════ 　
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[YARLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO @yarlo_wtf]

be like Carterefe go beat portable o

[Autumn 🔥 @anonymous110489]

@MachalaDoctor One of en tenants for banana island go give am that money

[Autumn 🔥 @anonymous110489]

Ogbafia dey for ground 🤣

[F E E Z @Feeztm]

See the way carter efe enter ring 😭😭😂😂

[Autumn 🔥 @anonymous110489]

@Theoladeledada W AI in the doctored chat

[DAZN Boxing @DAZNBoxing]

All action in round 2!!

#EfePortable | Live NOW on DAZN ▪️

[Autumn 🔥 @anonymous110489]

@VivianIfeomaOj Kogi ke?

[Autumn 🔥 @anonymous110489]

@MaleS99612 @drpenking You're an mkpi. Tueh

[Autumn 🔥 @anonymous110489]

@Ayo__musco Na catfish

[Autumn 🔥 @anonymous110489]

JUST IN:

A Fulani man used jazz to make another fulani man's gbola tp disappear. He tried to flee but unfortunately for him, He was waillayed by other fulani men who beat the living day light out of the mf. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[Autumn 🔥 @anonymous110489]

@BABATUNDE8080 At this point, the snakes are at risk not the other way round