A new phase of life : Empty nesters
When children leave home, they call it an “empty nest.” It sounds poetic, but the reality is less poetry and more practical: the food lasts longer, and the wet towel on the bed suddenly becomes a matter of national security. A house that once ran like Majestic Bus Stand at rush hour is now as quiet as Cubbon Park on a weekday afternoon.
For years, life revolved around their timetables. Their hunger schedule, sleep and school schedules , you planned family trips around exams, projects, and internships. Even your weekend vegetable shopping had to factor in “what they will eat”, as if the whole of Jayanagar market and Simply Namdaris was designed only for their taste buds. And now, suddenly, all that stops. The house feels empty, the fridge too , and your weekend evenings too free.
Of course, there are perks. You can eat dinner at 7 p.m. like a civilised person, instead of waiting when someone finishes “just one last game.” You can even travel without syncing calendars and WhatsApp groups. Some couples rediscover each other in this new phase. Your spouse, who until now was just a fellow project manager in the family startup, suddenly starts paying you more attention. Is this a good thing? Sometimes yes. Other times, no. When there are no teenagers around to distract, those books all over the house is suddenly drawing too much attention.
Do you miss the children? Naturally. Sometimes achingly. You’ll see their favourite chips in Nilgiris and feel a lump in your throat. You’ll enter their room and feel it’s unnervingly https://t.co/BS5nYI6ehm socks under the table, no water bottles under the bed. Other times, you don’t miss them at all. The freedom of not being tied to their schedules is delicious. You can rediscover hobbies, eat at places you like, go for long walks, or just sit with a book without someone asking, “What’s for dinner?” Just after finishing lunch.
The real heartbreaker and sometimes comedy show is the boomerang phase. They come home for the holidays, and suddenly the house is not yours anymore. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner are dictated by their cravings. “Why not biryani today?” “Can you make pasta tomorrow?” “How come there’s no Nutella and protein powder in the house ?” The family diet bends instantly back to their whims, and you find yourself cooking like it’s exam season again. Plans are made to eat at their favourite places. Their rooms are transformed overnight into disaster zones. Suitcases spill open, clothes occupy three chairs, and chargers dangle from every plug point like temple garlands. They treat the house like a hostel except the hostel is run by parents who provide free food and Wi-Fi. You are delighted they are home, of course, but you also remember exactly why you celebrated just a little when they first left.
And then, just as suddenly, they leave again. The fridge is full once more, the beds are neatly made, the silence is back, sharper this time, because it follows a burst of chaos.
How do parents cope? By keeping themselves very busy. By not making the absence into a headline. By slowly rediscovering that life can be full in other ways : through work, travel, friends, or just the quiet comfort of routine.
And how often do you think of them? Every day. Sometimes in a wave of nostalgia, sometimes just in passing ,like a dose joint you always went to or the smell of fresh laundry. Children leave, yes. But they live rent-free in your head and like most tenants in Bangalore, they’re never really leaving.
All in jest folks !
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