Asa Gonzalez

[Asa Gonzalez @AsaGonzalez]

@monti5starli @monti5starli
Bless you

[Neal Brennan @nealbrennan]

Pretty much everything in life under-delivers except for magic mushrooms.

[Asa Gonzalez @AsaGonzalez]

@FreddieGibbs if you loved baltimore check out the hustler club tonight!

[Bill Maher @billmaher]

I see the computer hackers Anonymous are going after Isis - if successful, it'd mean martyrs DO get screwed by virgins!

[Sarah Silverman @SarahKSilverman]

I think this here earth is the paradise we've been given. There's nothing after. So love & care for ur fellow humans 'cause this is it

[Mark Agee @MarkAgee]

Pilgrims had buckles up there because they ate so much they had to loosen their hats

[reggie watts @reggiewatts]

Happy Thanksgiving to you all. I am thankful for every molecule in existence!

[Neil deGrasse Tyson @neiltyson]

Now that robots move their limbs smoothly and with grace, I wonder how we’re supposed to imitate them on the dance floor.

[Mark Agee @MarkAgee]

I never believed in reincarnation before but... Dad?

[WikiLeaks @wikileaks]

Over 120 killed in Paris attacks tonigh by Islamic terrorism. Over 250,000 Syrians, Iraqis & Libyans killed. Not funny then. Not funny now.

[Big 🐰 @FreddieGibbs]

I thought Bruce Jenner was Jessica Lange on that vanity fair cover. 😂😂😂

[Daniel Mintz @danielmintz]

Isn't it weird how every time the Justice Dept investigates a police force they find a pattern of civil rights violations? So weird.

[#BlakEyeBarbieFriday @ILOVEBLACKMEN01]

“@snopes: Last night, Joseph Kent was abducted live on CNN:

http://t.co/oEQGNvYNIv #WhereIsJosephKent http://t.co/zryEaAD6aR”

[2DOPEBOYZ @2DopeBoyz]

The title-track off @FreddieGibbs’ recent EP gets a matching visual: http://t.co/GWCUC1mRHj

[Doug Benson @DougBenson]

Stay warm, east coast. Stay dry, west coast. Stay high, everyone.

[Daniel Mintz @danielmintz]

The @nytimes Art Dept FTW

[Dogfish Head Brewery @dogfishbeer]

Are you a fan of beers with a bit of age on them? http://t.co/5WDEISDOV4

[Emily Nussbaum @emilynussbaum]

Bummed (but unsurprised) that anyone found Amy & Tina's Cosby jokes offensive. The goal is not no rape jokes, IMO. It's good & smart ones.

[Nick Offerman @Nick_Offerman]

There are times when I prefer to order my Lagavulin the old-fashioned way.

http://t.co/Vjy6ohtW0g

#MyTalesOfWhisky #Ad #Japes

[Abbi Crutchfield @curlycomedy]

He went to Jared.