lolz

[Eagles Nation @PHLEaglesNation]

Nooooo!!! Not our lowest offensive output since Week 6 of the 2021 season!!! 😔

[Terrible Maps @TerribleMaps]

Wyoming has a lower population than the other 49 states COMBINED

[NBA Slime @TerryFranconia]

Friendly reminder you are soft and wanted the tush push banned

[Sam Stryker @sbstryker]

Your English teacher and your gym teacher are getting married 🧨

[The Drunk Republican @DrunkRepub]

People who have never watched 10 seconds of a WNBA game tuning in to see if another dildo lands on the court

[7/11 Truther @DaveMcNamee3000]

[the other guy cheating on his wife at the Coldplay concert] phew

[greg @greg16676935420]

When the Astronomer CEO logs on to LinkedIn

[‏ً @omgsidewalks]

10:00 am - anything is possible
2:00 pm - but not today

[7/11 Truther @DaveMcNamee3000]

when the hibachi chef does the onion volcano

[💭 @ayeshaxmisra]

pay your engineers. that is the only solution here. seeing as you raised ticket prices by 15% last july, and absolutely nothing has improved with the trains, what exactly are you doing with the added revenue?

[charlie @chunkbardey]

whenever ppl are like "we're looking for people <30 for a new project" it's like hmm. so the alligator is eating the bigger number which is 30. so that must mean they're looking for ppl who are younger than 30 in this case

[marina @bloodmajicks]

you’re latina? name the tres leches

[alfie @alfienxo]

just accidentally closed a tab i've had been meaning to read for the past 2 years

[Sell Side Pleb @sellsidepleb]

Yea this is quit your job at lunch weather

[Simon Holland @simoncholland]

Dads love saying, “I can see 3 eggs from where I’m standing that you haven’t found yet.”

[pj @pjayevans]

Hey it was great to meet you. Cool if I follow you on ig for the rest of my life

[Elle ⚘️🍉 @__shiticantsay]

As far as I'm concerned, the only legal definition of a woman should be:

When Shania Twain says, "let's go girls", do you go? If so, girl.

[lil h @hayleyrFoto]

can i be mean for a second and say no one cares about your AI generated doll version of yourself