ash

queer. i write things, find them in @autostraddle @reductress @theonion

[ash @ashnitweets]

did it hurt? when you used the st. ives apricot scrub

[ash @ashnitweets]

imagine u get to heaven and god is just a minion

[ash @ashnitweets]

a gender reveal party except it’s MY gender that gets revealed

[ash @ashnitweets]

i like bridgerton because it's like what if two hot people had sex while wearing too many clothes and a string quartet played top 40

[abi balingit 🌸 MAYUMU OUT NOW! 🌸 @theduskykitchen]

by tomorrow, MAYUMU will be in stores all over the country! 🤯 months ago, i asked writers that i admire for blurbs and i can’t help but share them because they make me feel so proud of my cookbook! :’)

[ash @ashnitweets]

oh this art is queer coded?? lemme meet the SWE behind it

[james factora @jamesfactora]

remember that moment in the 2010s when like midcentury swing dresses/modclothcore/rockabilly had Such a chokehold on queer femmes. jesus christ

[ash @ashnitweets]

bold to title a book “lord of the flies” and then not include a single prominent fly

[kelsey mckinney @mckinneykelsey]

Absolute banger of an advice column: https://t.co/lUNSFM9ghA

[ash @ashnitweets]

margarita w tequila: straight
margarita w mezcal: queer

[ash @ashnitweets]

bananas in pyjamas made me gay and no i will not be elaborating on that

[ash @ashnitweets]

say what u will about airport bathrooms but they’re usually cleaner and more spacious than the seat you’ll get in the gate area

[Lily @lilyarmweak]

praying for every friend group that broke the seal on joke-kissing last night

[alex turntine @turntineforwhat]

boy do I have the free book building for you

[shar @sharloola]

boo’d up ppl are so sick u ask them if they’re free and the reply’s like “i’m currently in the arms of my lover so cannot take calls” just say no

[ash @ashnitweets]

love calling jesus the “birthday boy”

[ash @ashnitweets]

@parallelle omg noooooooo!!!!! hope u keep testing negative

[ash @ashnitweets]

if the body keeps the score why is my score severe IBS

[ash @ashnitweets]

i just reactivated my linkedin after nine months and was immediately greeted by a message from my old boss asking if i blocked him....... please..... gen x.... do less

[ash @ashnitweets]

@parallelle ur right 😞 notes app apology incoming

[ash @ashnitweets]

more of y’all should be signing ur boyfriends up for sephora so u get double the birthday gifts