Aubs

human mullet

[Aubs @aubidhabi]

I want Oreos

[Aubs @aubidhabi]

TY is really good at surprises barstoolsports https://t.co/mQ0g2zhBld

[Aubs @aubidhabi]

Dunkin Donuts cannot toast a bagel. The last bagel I got was black. Today I asked for lightly toasted, it's also burnt. WTF DUNKIN

[Aubs @aubidhabi]

One bite everyone knows the rules https://t.co/Hr3Yg2HBBj

[tyler @tniko23]

Forgive me for the pepperoni but I love this gal

[Aubs @aubidhabi]

THIS ISNT EVEN WORTHY https://t.co/P463dU80fZ

[tyler @tniko23]

Supposed to be in the shower but I've been sitting here watching this video over and over @aubidhabi https://t.co/g3z8jV4YKt

[Aubs @aubidhabi]

You're not supposed to drive in the middle lane!!!!!!

[Aubs @aubidhabi]

Squirting breast milk in your eye cures pink eye #themoreyouknow

[Aubs @aubidhabi]

@tylernikolao You're a ho

[Trash @TrashQuavo]

Doitluhlikeigotleftoffbadandsushi

[Aubs @aubidhabi]

But you wouldn't sit outside with me when our neighbor was jamming out in his garage and it could be heard from our deck..... https://t.co/tkDvE8KVmT

[tyler @tniko23]

If you didn't listen to Hybrid Theory today I don't really know you.

[Aubs @aubidhabi]

It's a good day when the subway employee can barely close my sandwich bc there's so many veggies

[Aubs @aubidhabi]

Someone calls the office after hours. Leaves message. I call back. He says can you hold? Then hangs up. WHY DID YOU EVEN LEAVE A MSG THEN??

[Aubs @aubidhabi]

@chipotle my tortilla chips are chewy......

[Aubs @aubidhabi]

So unruly! He's even being rude to his grandma 😭

[Aubs @aubidhabi]

Then the boy says "give me your Phone. Do you have wifi? I need to find rural king" and snatches the phone from his mom

[Aubs @aubidhabi]

Mom" Youre gonna give him ideas" nurse "well $5 at rural king is better than $20 at the mall" boy "$20 is reasonable. Let's go now!"

[Aubs @aubidhabi]

The nurse starts to talk to the boy about the fidget spinner & the mom walks in "can we stop talking to him about price of fidget spinners"

[Aubs @aubidhabi]

His mom says "you need to stop playing with that. You have to give t back. You're gonna break it" he says "this thing is worthless"

[Aubs @aubidhabi]

Then he pulls a fidget spinner out his pocket and his mom says where did you get that "i got it from ___ and it sucks" then drops it