Dr. Heather

Mom of 4 | parenting psychologist | media | Age 0 — 5 specialist. ”Let's Get This Potty Started!” author.

[Dr. Heather @BabyShrink]

@operationdanish Getting excited about a political candidate ain’t all it’s cracked up to be. Gimme a boring, nerdy functionary who can keep the lights on and get the trash picked up ANY DAY.

[Dr. Heather @BabyShrink]

@operationdanish @BignaultJon Trust a bot with a physical exam of my very sick child, over a human doc with decades of experience? When the risk of mistake means an unnecessary spinal tap? Sorry - That ain’t coming anytime soon.

[Dr. Heather @BabyShrink]

@operationdanish When our pediatrician examined my little kid with a fever and stiff neck and confidently stated “this is NOT meningitis” and thereby prevented a painful, expensive, and unnecessary spinal tap - I have a hard time envisioning AI (in its current state) guiding us in that way

[Dr. Heather @BabyShrink]

Thrilled to be teaching again - this time to 500 Early Childhood Home Visitors in Phoenix. Incredible mission, fantastic conference! https://t.co/qeTgwU4qvY

[Dr. Heather @BabyShrink]

@AshleyGWinter I can send you my course or book if you need it. “Let’s Get This Potty Started! The BabyShrink’s Guide to Potty Training Your Toddler” 🚽👍

[Dr. Heather @BabyShrink]

@AshleyGWinter @KTJanePA Of course you don’t! Even the pediatricians don’t learn much about it. It’s the poor, ignored step child of medicine

[Dr. Heather @BabyShrink]

@AshleyGWinter Follow her temperament. Half of all toddlers pretty much are easy to train regardless. The other half - not so much. This is my wheel house. Happy to help w advice if you need it.

[Dr. Heather @BabyShrink]

Our Hawaii boy Bruno and early childhood development together - my 💗 be still

[Sesame Street @sesamestreet]

You've got this. 💛💚

[Dr. Heather @BabyShrink]

@KemtrupTweets It’s also a professional status thing. Psychiatrists also have less to prove. They feel less of a need to defend their treatment modality. Non-MDs are trained more with a chip on our shoulder and so internalize a need to justify our tx modalities - to insurance panels etc

[Dr. Heather @BabyShrink]

@JayceLong As parents, it’s hard to accept our babies are naturally destructive as part of their will to thrive. It makes us unwilling to set limits, and thereby ensures GREATER destructive acting out by their child.

[Dr. Heather @BabyShrink]

@the_mel_jar @DanWuori

[Dr. Heather @BabyShrink]

Catch me sneaking in my psychoanalytic foundation

[Dr. Heather @BabyShrink]

@the_mel_jar

[Dr. Heather @BabyShrink]

@AshleyGWinter Pretty damn fabulous 🔥

[Dr. Heather @BabyShrink]

Altho, sometimes you gotta be cruel to be kind

[Allen Frances @AllenFrancesMD]

I think kindness is most important quality in psychotherapists.

Not usually sufficient to good outcome but almost always necessary.

Real problem in psych field that kindness is so ignored in selection/training/practice.

Some of worst therapists I've known have been supersmart.

[Dr. Heather @BabyShrink]

Parents need to be reassured: Growth and development necessarily includes aggression and destruction. Holding that lightly is the key to the child’s evolution

[Jayce Long @JayceLong]

— Christopher Bollas
Essential Aloneness
“Becoming a Living Reality”

[Dan Wuori @DanWuori]

What will your baby remember about infancy?

I was so touched by the caption that mckynlee.mckell used to accompany this video shared to IG: “These little moments that they won’t remember, but I’ll never forget.”

And it’s true… at least in part.

At birth, babies brains are brimming with potential, but still only hinting at the processing power they’ll soon possess.

Among the structures yet to fully mature is the hippocampus, which helps to convert short-term memories into their long term counterparts. When you combine this immaturity with our initial lack of language (among other factors), the result is a phenomenon known as infantile amnesia.

Put simply, few if any of us retain detailed long-term memories of infancy into adulthood. At least not in the traditional sense.

But there’s something happening in this video that this little one is incorporating into something far more lasting: a sense of self.

When we are loved deeply by highly engaged, responsive caregivers we form secure attachments. We learn that the world is safe and that our needs will be met. And this undergirds our longterm mental health.

We may not recollect every moment, but on whole our nervous systems do. And these loving interactions play a key role in who we will become.

So give all the kisses. And have all the talks. How we remember may be limited (when compared to adult forms) but that doesn’t make these interactions any less impactful.