elf™

Born, then did stuff. Smol woodland creature. Stealer of your keys, socks, & many foods. Hater of coconut. I ❤️ Moosens.

[elf™ @baconelf]

How to be a beautiful moose:

- be a moose
- dont take anyones crap
- if anyone gets near you, gore them repeatedly with your antlers
- stomp on them too
- make friends with flying squirrel

[elf™ @baconelf]

@SneakerPeach i duno, put them on my tiny pile of packs im saving for a rainy day

if folks wanted the good Pokemons they should have gotten cards in 1999 ha ha ha

[elf™ @baconelf]

@SneakerPeach AND I bought 2 packs of Pokemon cards....just becuz

[elf™ @baconelf]

@HQNewsNow the stupid farmers will eat up what he says. the farmers that dont eat it up, well, they will regret voting for him and vote for the GOP again.

[elf™ @baconelf]

@SneakerPeach at times i also need sporting bras:

[elf™ @baconelf]

@SneakerPeach Bonus: I got some new stickers, so ima happy boi

[elf™ @baconelf]

@SneakerPeach i was out....selling things....stuff....

[elf™ @baconelf]

@tessaworld Amazon not so fresh

[elf™ @baconelf]

@SneakerPeach i was out since 3, working lol

[elf™ @baconelf]

@SneakerPeach it smells like this one weird youth pastor in church...

[elf™ @baconelf]

@SneakerPeach sorry, i see gnomes and...things happen....i will keep away from the garden section and stay sampling the paints...for flavor

[elf™ @baconelf]

@SneakerPeach but but but extra stops are what makes trips out worth it.....*sulks*

[elf™ @baconelf]

@SneakerPeach cn' we get burritos now?

[elf™ @baconelf]

@SneakerPeach im 2'3" (and a half, i growed a half!)

pretty big for a elf

[elf™ @baconelf]

@SneakerPeach i need it becuz ima growin boy!

[elf™ @baconelf]

@SneakerPeach they are real assholes about sharing toaster pastries, too.

i bought the box, i get seven! SEVEN!

[elf™ @baconelf]

@SneakerPeach hes my lil buddy, he is cuddly (but also dangerous, because moose)

[elf™ @baconelf]

@CBSNews Back*

*Now with more Screw Worms!

[elf™ @baconelf]

@EinienX @Vanessa_ABee @nitenitemeliss2 uh huhs....whats that behind you....an ENTIRE CASE OF LUTEFISKS