Bad Advisor, MBA,CFA

C's. Fee's. and UIT's (Advisor Parody Account. Entertainment only)

[Bad Advisor, MBA,CFA @bad_FA]

Who’s Warren Buffett?

[Bad Advisor, MBA,CFA @bad_FA]

‘90’s fashion. Back in.

[Bad Advisor, MBA,CFA @bad_FA]

So what’s been going on?

[GSElevator @GSElevator]

#1: A market sell-off is worse than divorce. I lose half of my money, but my wife is still around.

[Bad Advisor, MBA,CFA @bad_FA]

Glad I put all my clients in stadium-backed Munis.

[Bad Advisor, MBA,CFA @bad_FA]

If this virus keeps this shit up, I’m pretty sure I can be a scratch by the end of May. So keep sending golf balls. Even though you can’t do meetings.

[Bad Advisor, MBA,CFA @bad_FA]

Put a quarantine sign and police tape around my office. Haven’t been audited in like three weeks...Also still in cash. Waiting for the rebound.

[Bad Advisor, MBA,CFA @bad_FA]

Forget the markets. The real crisis is that my firm may ban wholesalers due to coronavirus concerns. Who the hell is going to buy my lunch?

[Bad Advisor, MBA,CFA @bad_FA]

To all my clients: I told you ..we hold cash for 10 years and then buy the dip. This is what you pay me for!!!
#winning. #WealthManagement

[Bad Advisor, MBA,CFA @bad_FA]

Also, my Long-Only Beanie Baby portfolio is positive again. Open to new investors...FYI fee structure is 5 & 30 as always.

[Bad Advisor, MBA,CFA @bad_FA]

I know I’ve been gone awhile but my correction call finally looks good. Taking in new clients again.

[Bad Advisor, MBA,CFA @bad_FA]

Every time a wholesaler walks by, yell "DEAD MAN WALKING!!" Watch them turn white...

[Bad Advisor, MBA,CFA @bad_FA]

All morning long, every time I see someone with wired earbuds I yell "LOSER".

[Bad Advisor, MBA,CFA @bad_FA]

There few things more painful to watch than a new wholesaler trying to do the "Awkward Walk-through".

[Bad Advisor, MBA,CFA @bad_FA]

Never. Ever. Do this.

[Bad Advisor, MBA,CFA @bad_FA]

Ok. I'll say it. Bon Costes's suits are terrible.

[Bad Advisor, MBA,CFA @bad_FA]

Seeing these athletes makes me wish I wasn't banned for doping.

[Bad Advisor, MBA,CFA @bad_FA]

I drink water from the tap in the kitchen.
#officebadass

[Bad Advisor, MBA,CFA @bad_FA]

If you voted for Bernie....enjoy the call center...

[Bad Advisor, MBA,CFA @bad_FA]

I don't know what the big deal is...basically everything I've ever said has been stolen from someone else.