Becci Smith

[Becci Smith @beccirsmith]

@mpellittieri This is Richard, I’d like to think that he has a very kissable snoot

[Becci Smith @beccirsmith]

Just wondering why we still have to pay for @amazon two day shipping, when I’m fact it’s now always a week, plus, shipping.

[Becci Smith @beccirsmith]

@Spotify

[Becci Smith @beccirsmith]

Just got an unsolicited dick pic from an unknown number. Le sigh. Being a woman , in the time of social media is great.

[Becci Smith @beccirsmith]

Everyone better get better at wearing their masks, because I refuse to have this @AvrilLavigne concert be canceled.

[Becci Smith @beccirsmith]

I’ve never been this relaxed in my life. He needs to teach me his ways.

[Becci Smith @beccirsmith]

One of my students brought me Sunny D today, because the other day I saw him drinking it and mentioned how I hadn’t had it since I was a kid. This kid needs to be protected at all cost.

[Becci Smith @beccirsmith]

I bought a new phone case, because my old one broke. As I was taking it out of the packaging, my dog ripped it out of my hand and broke it. I’m case you need to get rid of your puppy fever.

[Becci Smith @beccirsmith]

A student pulled out a mini drum set in the middle of lunch. How did grade 8 end up being more chaos than grade 1/2?

[Becci Smith @beccirsmith]

My coworker thought I was in my late 40s, early 50s. I apparently need to try harder

[Becci Smith @beccirsmith]

Golf sounds like a terrible sport to see live. Imagine going to a sporting event, just to be shushed

[Becci Smith @beccirsmith]

Things I didn’t expect I’d have to say: Richard, get your tail out of my eyeball. Things I say 85 times a day: Richard, get your tail out of my eyeball

[Becci Smith @beccirsmith]

I would like to thank @Netflix_CA for having us Brooklyn 99 fans’ back, and getting the episodes immediately. I think I speak for all of us when I say thank you.

[Becci Smith @beccirsmith]

@tmoekepickering Our dog trainer told me that she’s never seen a dog be able to ignore someone as well as mine ignores me. I’m there with you! 😂

[Becci Smith @beccirsmith]

The trainer told me that she’s never seen a dog be able to tune someone out, so well. You know.... just in case you’re wondering how training is going.

[CK Public Health @CKPublicHealth]

If you retweet anything all week, retweet this - CK's Bradley Centre Clinic is now open to walk-in's for 1st AND 2nd doses! Spread the word! #TwoDoseSummerCK #ckont

[Becci Smith @beccirsmith]

Dresses: for when it’s too hot to wear clothes, but too illegal not to.

[Gregory Mansfield @GHMansfield]

“It’s only one step” is not reassuring to a wheelchair user.

For many disabled people, one step is exclusion.

[Becci Smith @beccirsmith]

So today I accidentally wore a @nbcbrooklyn99 themed shirt that has a stack of VHSes and various titles of their sex tapes. So that’s how my day had been. How about you?

[Becci Smith @beccirsmith]

If I could ask for one thing from the universe, I’d ask for the confidence of a mediocre straight white man. I’d love to know how it feels to have so much audacity and so little self awareness