Bert Craven

Technologist. Strategist. IT Leader. Airline guy. Views are my own. Bring your own pinch of salt.

[Bert Craven @bertcraven]

@guardian you app is broken again. Quick Cryptic crossword clues will not display. Screen will not scroll down.

[Bert Craven @bertcraven]

@UbisoftSupport how do I contact you? There doesn't seem to be any way of raising issues with Ubisoft store purchases.

[Bert Craven @bertcraven]

Prison is too good for some people.

[No Context Brits @NoContextBrits]

This has ruined my weekend.

[Bert Craven @bertcraven]

@clemensv Dude, I was on Grindr before the rain had stopped...

[Bert Craven @bertcraven]

@markrendle Will the prescription read, take-it-til-you-make-it?

[John Frankensteiner @JFrankensteiner]

I put Van Morrison into a Chinese translator and I feel like I'm going insane

[Bert Craven @bertcraven]

If Americans put half as much energy into insisting that restaurants pay their staff properly as they do into arguing about tipping, this would all be over in a day.

[Bert Craven @bertcraven]

Hey, @btbusinesscare I've not been able to access my voice mail since 5th Feb. Your support people keep telling me it's fixed and closing my tickets even though it's not. They never even bother to check. Absolutely useless bunch of clowns.

[Bert Craven @bertcraven]

This mind-blowing game-changer has everyone saying the same one weird thing and you won't believe how unrecognizable it is.

[Bert Craven @bertcraven]

@qikipedia "Northern Scandinavia" is far too vague. I need a list of actual names and addresses.

[Bert Craven @bertcraven]

@TesterFromLeic What the hell is "RUSINESS PERPECTES"? Did an AI make this?

[Bert Craven @bertcraven]

WARNING : anyone trying to reproduce this experiment using a real cat should be aware that the cat may try to switch sides just as you are closing the door, in which case, see Schrodinger's Cat. 3/3

[Bert Craven @bertcraven]

Much as we cannot determine the living state of Schrodinger's Cat until the box is opened, we cannot determine the rectitude of the cats position until the door is closed. Once the door is closed, whichever side the cat is on is the wrong side. 2/3

[Bert Craven @bertcraven]

We all know of Schrodinger's Cat. I would like to propose Craven's Cat. In this thought experiment we must determine not if the cat is alive or dead but whether it is on the right or wrong side of a door. 1/3

[Bert Craven @bertcraven]

@WadeWegner Hi Wade, I have had my Polestar 2 since March and it's great. I can't compare it to the Tesla but still a big 👍 from me.

[Bert Craven @bertcraven]

Possibly the best advertisement for political correctness yet.

[Bert Craven @bertcraven]

The things that LinkedIn thinks I want to know absolutely beggar belief. It is the Labyrinth Bag Lady of information.

[Bert Craven @bertcraven]

@jamesamatthews Not a fucking clue. Today's pointless and unintelligible message at the very top of my What's Happening panel reads, "Suns at Nuggets". I have no idea what this means. Is it a secret code?

[katie @katefeetie]

the silliest nyc take i've seen lately is "new yorkers are leaving the city in droves because of crime." new yorkers are leaving the city in droves because of rent prices. the criminals we're escaping are called landlords

[Bert Craven @bertcraven]

@SarahKSilverman You are providing Twitter with free advertising for their Blue Ticks service. Pour encourager les autres.