Laura Kay

Hello there *waves manically*

[The Curfew Micropub @TheCurfew2014]

Here's the poster for our Spring Beer Festival, running from noon on 28th April though to close on 1st May. 40 casks, Belgian classics etc.

[𝗧𝘄𝗼𝗽 𝗧𝘄𝗶𝗽𝘀 @TwopTwips]

AVOID making a show of yourself at the office Xmas party by turning up absolutely pissed at work every day of the year. (via @Midgetgems26)

[Hammond Charcuterie - Meat you can be proud to eat @HammondCharcute]

Meet the Makers - Spittal Sunday 4th 10.30 till 4pm open workshops and shopping @NorthernEdge_ @BearClawBerwick and moi! Yes! All of us!

[Laura Kay @berwickberri]

Hope @achrisevans realises Derek from Berwick is a cockney (as opposed to Derek who is actually from Berwick of course)

[Naomi Rohatyn @omibaloney]

I know "champagne socialist" is supposed to be an insult but honestly who WOULDN'T want a nice glass of bubbly and universal health care

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

Honest job interview:

"What are your weaknesses?"

"I don't like talking to people, I'm silent in meetings and I'm rubbish at doing stuff"

[Quite Interesting @qikipedia]

Catfish have tens of thousands of tastebuds on the outside of their bodies, bit like us taking our tongue and stretching it around our body.

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

Meanings of "maybe"
1. No

[Laura Kay @berwickberri]

@stepho2k1 I just find it sooo frustrating! I know this wasn't blatant - but it clearly hints at who should play which what toys 😡😡😡

[Laura Kay @berwickberri]

@Morrisons agreed - so why make your display so obviously gendered?!

[Laura Kay @berwickberri]

Why @Morrisons ??? #toysknownogender

[Laura Kay @berwickberri]

@BBCEarth yes of course! Cat would be delighted with 30 seconds of fame 😉

[Laura Kay @berwickberri]

I just wrote a review on Salomon TRAIL 10 https://t.co/lvJpMtpRVX via @yotpo @gearforgirls

[Tamal Ray @DrRayBakes]

The NHS needs investment, not further cuts. As to where to get the money, that's a tricky question. But let's be honest about the problem

[Laura Kay @berwickberri]

Frikkin love #GBBO

[British Bake Off @BritishBakeOff]

Moderate moistness will not be accepted on #GBBO.

[Laura Kay @berwickberri]

Squeeeeeeeee excited #GBBO

[𝗧𝘄𝗼𝗽 𝗧𝘄𝗶𝗽𝘀 @TwopTwips]

DAILY MAIL COLUMNISTS. Don't forget to mutter "you couldn't make it up" whilst making shit up. Throws them off the scent. @chris_sloley

[𝗧𝘄𝗼𝗽 𝗧𝘄𝗶𝗽𝘀 @TwopTwips]

INSOMNIA SUFFERERS. Make the most of a bad situation by phoning Piers Morgan at 3am to call him a twat.