Let me guess one of the cats is religious and Ricky the cat says haha you silly god loving cunt and then one of the cats is fat and ugly and Ricky Gervais says haha you fat ugly cunt and then the cats wife dies and he learns the true meaning of Christmas to mopey piano ballads
When you think a girl is pretty and then she reposts bicep dom daddy tweets but ur built like tung tung tung sahur so you kiss your future together goodbye
>send potentially life changing risky text
>anxiously wait for her to text back
>pace around the room
>phone buzzes
>instantly check it like a trained dog
>it’s an email from chick-fil-a telling me they updated their privacy policy