⨗ (The Player Formerly Known as Mousecop)

Well you’re here now

[Fearghas Kelly @FearghasKelly]

I better go superviral for this...

[Populism Updates @PopulismUpdates]

I strongly believe that only some form of heavenly intervention or divine inspiration can produce a tweet like this

[Poetry Music @pu__tweets]

@TheCinesthetic Saving Private Ryan, The Martian, Interstellar

Trilogy where the US government spends trillions of dollars to get Matt Damon as he continues to get stuck further & further away from the United States..

[roxy demento @falseroxy]

this is an advanced stoned thought, but i think if my eyes were closed and kermit the frog walked into a room i'd be able to pick up on his energy and just know he was there.

[VividVivka 💜 @VividVivka]

Niche tweet

[christian @nopoweradeinusa]

shout outs to the guy at work tonight playing pool with his friend who asked me to play "Everlong" by foo fighters so he could "power up", followed by his friend very sweetly and very earnestly asking me not to play it because he would "power up"

[once and future wife geist @wife_geist]

construction vehicles in reverse

[dylan @narrenhut]

Steve Harvey: the category is “what you don’t want your eunuch doing.”

Emperor Qin Shi Huang: After much reflection, Mr. Harvey, the fortunes point me to “scheming.”

Steve Harvey: show me “scheming”!

(Buzzer dings, first tile flips over, Harvey and audience start going crazy)

[Immortan Joe Mazzulla @normal_jake_]

I watch this 5 times a day I am unwell

[NEW ACCOUNT IS @BLACCMASSXXL @blaccmassxx]

witnessed history , this is truly one of the greatest moments ive ever seen

[Ryan, Perdido en TX @RyanLostinTX]

The 16 year old kid bagging my groceries asked me how my day was going and I said “can’t complain” and he responded “probably wouldn’t do any good if you did” and honestly that kid is a straight shooter with upper management potential written all over him.

[Robert Barba @Barbawire]

That comma is putting in work today.

[Horse Nomad (Chicago-style) ⚔️ @Nomads4Pritzker]

The next season will inexplicably take place in rural China of 1966, with the cast navigating the challenges of Mao’s cultural revolution

[GoldenKnight @GoldenKnightGFX]

Nah man I had to add Meet the Grahams beat to this one this is insane 😬😭

[Bobby Wagner @bwags]

gonna start doing advanced analytics on my own letterboxd ratings by adjusting for the circumstances in which I saw the movie. having a coke and popcorn and seeing it on a big screen is basically just hitting in Coors Field

[Steven Kaas @stevenkaas]

You are not the king of your brain. You are the creepy guy standing next to the king going "a most judicious choice, sire".

[semaJ @semaJ7272]

Whole world treating Kyrie like he beat cancer this playoff run has been hilarious. He was just an asshole for 5 years