jay

every tweet is 150,000% true

[jay @boosername]

In the new yeat song they abduct don toliver in a ufo

[unusual_whales @unusual_whales]

11.9% of American households make over $200,000 a year, per WSJ

[jay @boosername]

ATTN: I have discovered an error in this tweet. What I meant to say was Penis Blister Parfait. Apologies to anyone who read the previous erroneous tweet.

[jay @boosername]

Penis Buster Parfait

[jay @boosername]

whoever GMO’d bananas did their thing #HatsOff

[jay @boosername]

Penis Buster Parfait

[jay @boosername]

insomnia got me googling Best Sleeping Positions 2025

[jay @boosername]

how I feel doing dry January

[jay @boosername]

I Sucked Off A Tesla Robot? (Story Time)

[jay @boosername]

[SERIOUS] I have a $5 etransfer for anyone fluent enough in Patois to tell me the lyrics of Charly Black & Pop Style - Cheap And Clean. Canadians only

[jay @boosername]

Ok Google Show me best G-Shock model to wear for having sex

[jay @boosername]

when I listen to Benny the Butcher i put my EQ on podcast mode

[jay @boosername]

@boringskeleton Me you and buddy chopping it up over a few creamers? I’ve had worse nights 🤷

[jay @boosername]

@yungbroll me in the hospital when my antipsychotics wear off and I see a giant spider w my dads face in the corner

[jay @boosername]

Just saw a group of dudes on e scooters barking directions and calling out cars at each other like the army

[jay @boosername]

Evil Oprah be like You get a yeast infection! And you get a yeast infection!!

[jay @boosername]

MY CYBORG GREAT GRANDSON:
what is it Sir boosername??

ME (succumbing to euthanasia at the age of 110, surrounded by family in my hospital bed but deciding to get one more lie in):
in... in the year 2025... I brought Polo back … i made it cool again…

[jay @boosername]

you’d never know how many similarities you have with someone until you really sit down and chop it up w them 💯

[jay @boosername]

Guy who was peer pressured into purchasing an illegal pistol on a trip to NY and has a felony:
Yo

[jay @boosername]

Half a sparkling water and a marijuana cigarette so small you need scientific instruments to see or measure it #TonightsDinner

[jay @boosername]

we all got that one coworker with the Terrifyingly ugly romantic partner