brain engager

Open yuor mind. Engage ur brain thru the Power of Tweet.

[brain engager @brainengager]

ERECTO PASCROTUM

[brain engager @brainengager]

My fat ass thought this was lana del ray

[DiscussingFilm @DiscussingFilm]

First look at Taika Waititi's next film ‘KLARA AND THE SUN’.

• Starring Jenna Ortega & Amy Adams

• Follows a robot bought by a family to help them heal physically & mentally in a dystopian future

• In theaters on October 23

[Nancy Comics by Ernie Bushmiller @JohnnyCallicutt]

Nancy By Ernie Bushmiller
June 3,1958

[brain engager @brainengager]

I'm in the kitchen eating a snack and it sounds exactly like I'm punching various materials in Minecraft

[brain engager @brainengager]

Do you know why they call it a paring knife? Because apPARINGtly it'll cut you yeeOWCH

[brain engager @brainengager]

Are You There, God? It's Me, Bam Margera And This Is Jackass

[brain engager @brainengager]

I remember things used to cost $24.99. Twenty Four Ninety Nine. It's a beautiful price, isn't it? Now, we have horrible prices like Forty Nine Ninety Nine

[Beany Tuesday @beanytuesday]

I think what makes Curtis Sliwa so endearing, despite his politics, is that he clearly comes from the Hey Arnold version of New York

[brain engager @brainengager]

Croutons on salad are is like cereal on milk where the milk is lettuce leaves and the cereal is the crouton

[brain engager @brainengager]

What's a cow's favorite cell service provider?
T-Moooobile

[brain engager @brainengager]

I heard there was a peepee chord /
that David played and God peed his shorts

[brain engager @brainengager]

*me, briefly forgetting what grape juice is

"They should make apple juice, but from grapes"

[brain engager @brainengager]

More like baa baa DEI sheep. Triggered, liberal?

[brain engager @brainengager]

Mama called the monkey doctor and the monkey doctor said "it is perfectly fine for monkeys to jump on the bed"

[brain engager @brainengager]

Uhhhhh go go gadget huge milkers

[brain engager @brainengager]

"it was too big a risk" said the loser who didn't win

[Pop Crave @PopCrave]

Kamala Harris reveals that her first choice for a running mate in the 2024 campaign was Pete Buttigieg but decided that it would be too risky to have a gay man alongside her on the ballot:

“Buttigieg would have been an ideal partner - if I were a straight white man. But we were already asking a lot of America: to accept a woman, a Black woman, a Black woman married to a Jewish man. Part of me wanted to say, Screw it, let's just do it. But knowing what was at stake, it was too big of a risk.”

[brain engager @brainengager]

When I was 8, I heard the word "vagina" for the first time. I had only heard it verbally and had no idea how to spell it. So, I went home and googled "girls berchina" to no avail and concluded that I would just have to wait to find out what that whole business was about.

[brain engager @brainengager]

There is a grown man in the Austin airport bathroom watching a single "6 7" tiktok at full volume over and over and giggling like a little girl

[brain engager @brainengager]

Don't you ever say no shit like that to me again

[brain engager @brainengager]

Drank soooooo much soda last night and now my tummy is bloaty. Gonna fix it with leftover Chinese food

[brain engager @brainengager]

@schriefpants can YOU find Wet Leg and Anderson Paak in this image?