I want to put this out here because some single persons who are about to make the ultimate decision of marriage might need it:
There’s a big difference between being financially comfortable as a single person and being comfortable when you’re married.
As a single person, it’s easy to feel like you’ve figured things out because your expenses are controlled and predictable. But the moment you get married, your baseline for everything changes. What you see as financial comfort now would require much more management to be enough. Because you have to feed, shelter and cater for 2 adults.
If you really want to understand or get ahead of it, take your current recurring expenses and multiply it by 4. That’s the kind of financial capacity it takes to maintain the same level of comfort you currently enjoy as a single person.
There is more. Being married without children is one thing. When you introduce children into the equation, the demands increases. At that point, multiply your single person expenses by eight for two kids. That’s when the real weight of responsibility starts to show.
Those ‘luxuries’ and cravings you will still be able to afford them, but you would not buy them. Because bills will come at you thick and fast, never ending. Eventually, you recondition to anticipate unforeseen expenses and become more conservative with personal spending.
My point is: Prepare. Have a trajectory and make sure you marry a partner who would work to support your home. That way, your income increases proportionally with your expenses.
Many single people think they’ve cracked the code on financial comfort and they jump into marriage without well detailed plans. They forget to factor that as single people, they’re operating in a controlled environment with limited variables. You can only understand it when you step into that phase of life.
@Maggiewitdsauce Happy Birthday to an amazing Lady @Maggiewitdsauce
I admire your intellectual prowess & the kind of orientation you exhale.
If the majority of your gender thinks & act like you, relationship will be a safe haven.
May this new year be filled with pleasant surprises for you
Some ladies build their personal lifestyle around what they can afford alone, but the moment they enter a relationship, their expectations suddenly jump to a standard they never maintained by themselves.
I am not saying it is wrong to desire better things in life, but it becomes a problem when someone expects a partner to constantly provide luxuries they cannot realistically provide for themselves.
In many cases, this pressure quietly damages relationships. Instead of partnership and mutual growth, the relationship turns into a financial test the man must keep passing.
Healthy relationships are not built on sudden lifestyle upgrades. They’re built on understanding, support, and growing together from wherever both people currently are.
When expectations become disconnected from personal reality, resentment often replaces affection and that’s where many relationships begin to break down.
@jon_d_doe So succinctly said and aptly put together. @jon_d_doe
Was having this conversation with a 'BOSS LADY' last month & she said the exact same thing & mentioned some people she knows who have & those who want to do them including nose, hip, jaw and breast. For a higher OS value
@gentlefejiro@kenkenlewu They are the enablers of that awful behaviours in many Ladies these days. Spend money on a woman who loves you, not for a woman to love you. Relationship is not a palliative or alleviation programme. Many broke amd hungry girls looking for survival in the guise of Relationship
@Bilal4046 @kenkenlewu It starts with N200 entitlement, and it grows from there beyond limits.
Wanting a relationship doesnt equate an immediate taking up responsibilities that seemingly can be handled without the guys involvement. Don't be an enabler of bad character commonly exhibited by many today