JosephGordonLevittoffTemu

[JosephGordonLevittoffTemu @brendannann]

If I was on love island everyone would make my fat ass breakfast and I’d get kicked off because they don’t have the budget for all that food

[JosephGordonLevittoffTemu @brendannann]

Saw a young guy buying a scale and dime bags at the smoke shop yesterday get that money bro #hungry #entrepreneur #grind

[JosephGordonLevittoffTemu @brendannann]

Hitchhiking as a means to network

[JosephGordonLevittoffTemu @brendannann]

Ate a full birria quesadilla before a 6.5 hr drive. Had to stop and blow up a poor little town’s only half decent gas station. I paid the price by not having any toilet paper and having to call the place and ask them to bring more toilet paper…

[JosephGordonLevittoffTemu @brendannann]

But hey I’m down 20 bucks and up a lot of karma. Good things coming my way soon trust

[JosephGordonLevittoffTemu @brendannann]

Walked around in the rain for an hour and talked with a homeless dude for half of it. Truly the definition of what life has to offer

[JosephGordonLevittoffTemu @brendannann]

Unfortunately it does warrant hanging my clothes up on the shower rack.

[JosephGordonLevittoffTemu @brendannann]

Was hoping for the rain to stop so I can hang out in the courtyard but yeah fuck it let’s rain for the next 12 hours. I don’t think I’ve reached the point yet where I smoke in my car as opposed to a courtyard I have access to, so I suppose that’s not an option.

[JosephGordonLevittoffTemu @brendannann]

Fell asleep after work and had a great dream of having a beautiful intelligent cat and an ice cold Bapple. Woke up to my cat licking her butthole and sprinting around the house after taking a shit and a lukewarm shot of the Captain, whose name is Morgan!!

[JosephGordonLevittoffTemu @brendannann]

Genuinely what do you say when someone knocks on your door while you’re taking a shit. Just said I’m in here and that sounds personal, but I also said someone’s in here, and that sounds like an edgelord. Definitely not saying occupied. I think I just cough right?

[father soto @skiinpants]

i understand, that could be really triggering if you’re a fucking pussy

[JosephGordonLevittoffTemu @brendannann]

Genuinely just got set up by some new friends, tricked into attending a sermon about prostitution in the Bible, and religiously assaulted, great way to kick off my college career!!

[JosephGordonLevittoffTemu @brendannann]

Also just saw a fat blond kid peeking out of the fence at a school and my day is now completely ruined

[JosephGordonLevittoffTemu @brendannann]

Wanted a foot job under the table at Taco Bell but that definitely did NOT happen

[JosephGordonLevittoffTemu @brendannann]

Just tried a mango for the first time why the fuck did nobody tell me they were so good???

[JosephGordonLevittoffTemu @brendannann]

I have the smell of pussy juice and wings on my fingers, life is good.

[Zhang Yong 张勇 @zhangyong02]

drop disaster food computer shatter ,. new year already ruin ,. will kill self

[JosephGordonLevittoffTemu @brendannann]

@SuspectFed This is Socrates of our time 🙏🏼🙏🏼