dan

Zetus Lapetus!!

[dan @burtbeeofficial]

people are always talkin about wanting European culture when all it is is smoking cigarettes and wearing tight t-shirts

[dan @burtbeeofficial]

just searched “Coffee Table” on Facebook Marketplace!!

[dan @burtbeeofficial]

what is going on

[dan @burtbeeofficial]

DEADSTOCK Pope Francis zucchetto‼️need savvy investors with the VISION to step up ASAP

[dan @burtbeeofficial]

need Lydia Tár fan cams asap

[dan @burtbeeofficial]

all the dorks strutting in fast fashion fail to realize their fit smells like the inside of a halloween mask

[dan @burtbeeofficial]

Celtics beat Sixers: God will punish the City of Philadelphia until every last life on this planet is extinguished

Sixers beat Celtics: haha! what a silly game basketball is!! sports capture the human spirit in such a profoundly beautiful way!!!

[dan @burtbeeofficial]

i love to meet other people in finance and not listen to them when they explain their jobs

[leering heathen @languidoaf]

they should spill something nice in the environment

[dan @burtbeeofficial]

gonna weep with the fellas at the Big Thief show tn!! 💯 💯

[dan @burtbeeofficial]

birds

[dan @burtbeeofficial]

told the barber I want to look like Billy Zane in Twin Peaks and got escorted out immediately :/

[dan @burtbeeofficial]

@hurricanebeans next time I see you we are playing

[dan @burtbeeofficial]

my landlord is putting in a pickleball court right outside my bedroom window. how many bees would I have to mail them to make this stop

[dan @burtbeeofficial]

they shoulda gave the grinch a Glock

[dan @burtbeeofficial]

the TSA lady said I look like Keanu Reeves. y’all could not possibly understand this lifestyle

[dan @burtbeeofficial]

hungover on a Wednesday in Oklahoma City. I live the dream

[dan @burtbeeofficial]

someone ripped the rear window wiper off my car???? guess that’s big city livin 😈☺️😈

[dan @burtbeeofficial]

uh oh just had a few