Colten

As iron sharpens iron.

[Colten @c_murph3]

Got my wisdom teeth taken out Friday. Don't remember much but mom recorded some. Here's a few parts, enjoy.

[Colten @c_murph3]

Packing to leave the house for a few hours, grabbing beer and formula. Because I’m here for a good time but I’m also a responsible father 😌

[ely kreimendahl @ElyKreimendahl]

if screens bad why watching big screen while holding little screen feel so good

[Colten @c_murph3]

Which came first, the car or the road? Idk just something to think about

[Colten @c_murph3]

Y’all ever have a mental crisis at 9:51 on a Tuesday night?

[Colten @c_murph3]

Dry January but all I drink is champagne and dry wines

[Matt Margheim @Matt_Margheim]

Thinking about starting my autobiography now, that way if I decide I want to write one later, I won’t have to feel rushed.

[Colten @c_murph3]

thanks for nothing “friends”. had to just buy one myself smh..

[Colten @c_murph3]

Does anyone have a car I can have

[Colten @c_murph3]

Every once in a while I treat myself to a coffee and donut run at the little shop on my way home from the gym. This morning the lady said my order before I could finish saying it. Romance isn’t dead

[Colten @c_murph3]

I actually woke up and scared Lydia at 5am this morning with an absolutely thunderous fart. Sorry sweetie that’s just show biz

[Colten @c_murph3]

I drove a Tesla last night. Sorry to flex on you all like that :/

(it was not mine)

[Colten @c_murph3]

Hi @gopuff I ordered 3 hours ago and haven’t received my order pls send backup

[Colten @c_murph3]

@NBA y’all hirin?

[Colten @c_murph3]

Nvm I’m fine now!!

[Colten @c_murph3]

If you’re ever feeling down bad, take a nap. It doesn’t really solve anything but you’ll wake up with less time in the day

[Colten @c_murph3]

@lanitamargheim You better be getting a road trip chocolate milk!

[Colten @c_murph3]

Real life. Team regular milk or team chocolate milk? Let me know in the comments

[Colten @c_murph3]

Time for a quick nap

[Colten @c_murph3]

Just spent $300 at Costco should I pick up some chipotle on the way home?

[Colten @c_murph3]

I shoulda studied to be a billionaire in school that’s my bad lmao