Mady Call

basically an 80 year old cat lady

[Mady Call @call_mady]

What did the man say when he lost his truck?

What the BEEP? Where’s my truck?

[Mady Call @call_mady]

if you love me you’ll buy me disney+

[Mady Call @call_mady]

Dad: Asher will you take out the trash
My 16 year old brother: why do I have to do it I don’t even throw anything away.
My whole family: WHERE DO YOU PUT YOUR TRASH THEN

[Mady Call @call_mady]

Why does my eyesight have to be android quality

[Mady Call @call_mady]

This was ten years ago... he’s talking about me. Im the friend and no, I still don’t understand. 🙃

[Mady Call @call_mady]

Friday the 13th sucked I didn’t even die

[Mady Call @call_mady]

This has hands down been the weirdest year of my life, was it good?? Was it bad?? I have literally no clue

[Mady Call @call_mady]

@Beau__Bonin Let’s fight, Rn

[jm @JmikeReiszner]

Est. August 31, 1999🎂

[Mady Call @call_mady]

Where’s my $20

[rico @somethinglovely]

There is a monster in my ear and it's telling me im worthless.

[Mady Call @call_mady]

YES, I am aware I have two twitter accounts. NO, I can’t get into my other one. HAHA kill me because it’s oh SO cringey ㋛

[Mady Call @call_mady]

I’m genuinely scared of the people that still iron every single clothing item they own, to have that much patience is INSANE. I’m pretty sure the only thing I’ve successfully ironed is those bead art things from my childhood.

[Texas Humor @TexasHumor]

Dehydration > Unsweet Tea

[Mady Call @call_mady]

My brother at 1 am:
Asher: What kind of bees make milk
Me: umm... I don’t know
Asher: Boobees

[Mady Call @call_mady]

The way Benedict Cumberbatch says penguins in that one documentary has been stuck in my head all day. Pengwings? Penglings? I don’t even know anymore

[Mady Call @call_mady]

@morgannguthriee I can almost promise I won’t

[Mady Call @call_mady]

How do you tell your grandma you don’t wanna sleep in her bed because you have a fear that your gunna wake up and she’ll be dead🤷🏼‍♀️ asking for a friend....