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[hyper-bicurious yeah @zonevivi]

sami landri is the acadienne daughter of katya, but like katya asexually reproduced her and abandoned her in a forest in New Brunswick to be raised by the local beaver population.

[nozomi @grandnozomi]

i come home from a long day of work, staple papers with my trapinch stapler, blow my nose with a tissue from the vileplume tissue holder, throw it away into the trubbish garbage can, and then sit in front of the poliwhirl fan for a nice, cool breeze.

[jon @delillostan]

Gay guys talk about Brazil like wistful white boys talk about Japan

[𝓓𝓸𝓬_𝔃𝓮𝓮 ✧ @doc_zee7]

Co-worker: this is the first time I've ever seen you smile at work, what's up??

Me: i'm about to quit this job

[☔ @Whotfismick]

Nobody:

Me and Grandma when we used to chill together:

[melody @melkuo]

my mayor chinese
my bagels french-canadian
my naans leavened
my raps out in seven

[Ooo @ooogoesbrrr]

when you’re in a Teams meeting and you’re not paying attention and you suddenly hear your name

[Yesse @_yessee_]

I told my coworkers where’s my $20 for pride and now I have to meet with HR….

[Ray Mond @AmberRayz]

Me after saying I have to lock in:

[white woman w/ a yelp account @blakeissweaty]

She looks like she’s about to instruct a Montessori classroom full of 8 year olds on how to sculpt small terracota figures reminiscent of the Indus Valley civilization

[Rochelle Meyer @Rochelle__Meyer]

To sit by the ocean and disassociate.

[yimikal. @yimikaaaa]

I love hearing “in the interest of time” during meetings. Yes. Let’s wrap this up quickly!

[𝐓𝐢𝐦𝐢✰ @_timiszn]

Me realizing everybody is replaceable, including me.

[Keunam @Keunam_]

Zona cactus.🌵🌸

[S.🎧 @1ssve]

People who post on LinkedIn and love their corporate career terrify me.

[yogi @DJpastawater]

The Brandy Melville, Stussy and soon the Sumaq line will all converge at Queen-Spadina McDonald’s

[soup🌱 @thrluv]

hot honey dubai chocolate flavored SSRI matcha protein infused GLP-1 suppository ft ludacris

[Kelsey Danielle @Klsydanielleart]

I forgot to post the finished results here—I kinda love it 🥹 Lapras is definitely one of my favorite pokemon

[jz2 @mixedgrass666]

Vacation brain is awesome. All I did was eat and drink and walk around and not deny myself anything so my brain is like “wow great town. I should move here. It would probably be like this every day”