Maritim

[George T. Diano @georgediano]

Marriage is the only school where certificate is issued first then lessons later. Chesaa!!

[Mheshimiwa🇰🇪 @kibetJBrigid]

Duale is "Si ni mimi nakushow" 😂😂😂on #JKL

[Maritim @chela_maritim]

@KenyaPower_Care

[Maritim @chela_maritim]

Hello @KenyaPower_Care..
We have not had power in this specific location in Ruaka for 3days now. Kindly address the issue. Mtr no; 92105744020

[Maritim @chela_maritim]

@_KenyaPowerDM_ Pls check my response on DM

[Maritim @chela_maritim]

@slimmnotexotic 🤣🤣🤣

[PakaMeow🐈 @pakameoww]

"umepata ama ?" Is a polite way to remind you to say thank you

[Farhiya ✨ @farhiiiyaaa___]

In work emails, I often speak in plural and people assume that I mean me and the organisation. Wrong. I mean me and my symbiote. We will get on it. We will keep you updated. We are Venom.

[ᗰIYᗩGI𖤍 @justachillbloke]

Nikisema "what's up" simaanishi "How are you?" I mean tell me why you are messaging me.

[Bavina @sifa_bavina]

Nikiingia matatu I scout for the skinniest passenger nakaa naye because it is quite comfortable that way.

[Brooke Logan @ThandoPeaches]

Adulting really zipped my lips. I have nothing to say lately 🫠

[ICHIKA @ICHIKArlfjq]

Every family's useless conversation after funeral, "guys we have to arrange a reunion and stop meeting at funerals only."

[Tumezoza kwa mneti @felix_odhiambo_]

Crossing busy road in Nairobi hukuwa so funny. People wait for one person to sacrifice himself on behalf of others 😂

[Prince254 @wizara123]

Social studies ilikua scam wewe ushai ona mtu wa tribe ya rendile😂😂

[Shad @Shad_khalif]

The worst part about this economy is that you’ll have money, spend it wisely and still get broke now you’re beating yourself up for wasting money but in reality everything is just so fucking expensive

[WANGECHI @wangechikenya]

Nobody: …..
Nairobi sun from 6 am: 🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞🌞

[𝐉!𝐌𝐌𝐘 🔰 @kafangi]

Niliwahi ambia someone's daughter about my upbringing akaniambia niko na childhood trauma eti nitafute therapist, guys kwani kuchapwa na kamba na kulala kama hamjakula haikuwa common unit?

[Yoko @Kibet_bull]

That guy who shouted 'Raila' when someone said "Risasi imebaki ngapi,itanasa nani?' should be awarded.

[George T. Diano @georgediano]

I really hate Mondays, anyway ndio kutoka mjengo. Fellow peasants, how are y'all doing today. Have you eaten anything bcoz for me my stomach is as empty as Sudi's head. Has the perennial loser jetted in? How is your mental health & How are you financially. Is Ruto still alive?