Chelsea Curran

veni vidi vino

[Chelsea Curran @chelcurran]

Waking up to pop some @TUMSOfficial after a wild night of.. cannoli cake. Happy 30th Birthday: Pregnancy Edition #canihavearedo

[Brian Entin @BrianEntin]

FBI at the house. https://t.co/DgrhwZrehB

[Chelsea Curran @chelcurran]

And suddenly I’m a mom who signs up to bring the fruit platter for preschool Thanksgiving lunch #whendidthathappen

[Chelsea Curran @chelcurran]

I’d love to know the story behind that one shoe you pass on the side of the highway. #lifesgreatmysteries

[Chelsea Curran @chelcurran]

@chrissyteigen I’ve been waiting for this moment. Here’s my “kitchen clean-up tip” on The Chew (R.I.P.) circa 2015.

[Chelsea Curran @chelcurran]

@JetBlue I would have been refreshing my browser for the past 21 hours. I recommend adding an asterisk on your site so it doesn’t imply that you’ll be able to proceed with your purchase. Here’s hoping I don’t lose my flight.

[Chelsea Curran @chelcurran]

Dear @JetBlue, why prompt me to buy more points at checkout when the points don’t download instantly- therefore, I now have to wait 2 days to buy my flights. Terrible user experience. And thanks to your CS rep for telling me to read the terms and conditions. Enlightening advice.

[Chelsea Curran @chelcurran]

I can finally wear a #filthymouthedwife tee-shirt without it being weird. thanks chrissy. @chrissyteigen

[Chelsea Curran @chelcurran]

Dear @celinedion, “It’s All Coming Back to Me Now” is literally the only song that consoles my overtired 2 month old. Thank you. Sincerely, A Grateful New Mom.

[Chelsea Curran @chelcurran]

@KALIfragalistic Omg DON’T MAKE ME CRY

[Chelsea Curran @chelcurran]

@POTUS @realDonaldTrump @IvankaTrump please change this statistic. #angryasamother via @thebump

[Chelsea Curran @chelcurran]

The smells of public transportation are not kind to a pregnant gal

[Chelsea Curran @chelcurran]

The @StarKistCharlie Connecticut radio ad sounds like Charlie just got a tooth pulled and the novocaine hasn’t worn off #wedontsoundlikethat

[Chelsea Curran @chelcurran]

When did we collectively decide “nap time” is not an integral part of the day?

[Chelsea Curran @chelcurran]

When you get to talk about moving back home w your mom on @ElvisDuranShow it makes things a little better #NewlywedCellarDwellers thanks guys love you!

[Chelsea Curran @chelcurran]

@Drake time for a new challenge, like pay my credit card debt

[Chelsea Curran @chelcurran]

@CourtyPans Lmao wait. You should. We’re discussing this.

[Chelsea Curran @chelcurran]

If you’re looking for me, I live at LAX now. @flyLAXairport #delaysfordays

[Chelsea Curran @chelcurran]

If this isn’t the truest thing I’ve ever read. #ANADigital @Airbnb

[Chelsea Curran @chelcurran]

If I showed up on time for things, people would think something was wrong. I must not alarm others and therefore will be late for the remainder of life.