chockynizing❤️❤️

Live life the way it should be #₿TC

[Emmanuel Echeta @PenTitan]

Who get vibrator, dildo and rose for house, no wan dey sleep around

Who get pocket toto for house, na pervert

No shaking

[T-Bg @_iamtbag]

"Bro I told you to leave ladies alone and chase the bag first"

[: @_dxllz7]

"I can’t wait to start working so I can help my family."

Me with my first paycheck:

[🍒 @nimibillions]

e get some kind L you go chop, you go first off your phone go sleep.

[dt2 @Daminitek2]

If you see wetin feminist dey do on top preeq
Guyyy water go comot ur eye 🥲😂

[superdad @udysznx]

everybody don mature, nobody dey laugh anybody car again.

anyone you hold like this, na senior man you be.

[toye. @adetxye]

this economy de rlly help me differentiate between core needs, partial needs n wants

[superdad @udysznx]

this government don ruin my 20s bro. as i dey watch film, my conscience dey judge me say i dey waste my life instead of making money.💔

[CITYBOY @Boy994Boy]

Because I no get money, na why you call me sex addict instead of naughty boy

[Peetah Law @peetahlaw__]

Whenever Kizz Daniel’s Sofa comes up on your shuffle, you cannot skip it. That’s the kind of evergreen record it is.

[Big Jikada🇵🇹🏁 @bigjikada0]

Yes, they exist. Take me for example, if I eat rice and beans with stew and cow meat, my stomach go swell

[PLATO @Toadvenom063]

Normal Ewedu spending ohh

Inside 1.4b

Na only that .4 I fit spend

Anything wey go reduce me to millionaire, I no wan see am again

[Menya @menyaaaaaaaaaaa]

He said he couldn’t wait to meet my father because my father is a great man and his role model.

My father married 4 wives with 16 children.

[ÀwámáridinifẹOlúwasímí Esq😚 @Awamaridiii]

I've been seeing a lot of dry bathroom and dry slippers pr on the tl, and I can't take it anymore😭.

I hate dry bathroom floors, I will pour water on it. I hate dry slippers, I rinse my feet every minute. I hate dry toilet seats.

Dry bathroom floor una😒

[Ayo @Alhajirostova]

American: So there are terrorists causing problems in your country, right?

Nigerian: Yes.

American: That's terrible. Is the government at least doing something about it?

Nigerian: Well, our president addressed the issue.

American: Oh. What did he say?

Nigerian: He spoke about the law of lawf in the holy book

American: ...The law of love?

Nigerian: I guess

American: Okay. Did you send the military after them?

Nigerian: Hmm... at times.

American: What do you mean "at times"?

Nigerian: Sometimes we've heard the military went after them. In some cases, the terrorists ended up killing military personnel.

American: Wait. They killed your soldiers?

Nigerian: Yes.

American: Okay, so then your government retaliated and finished them off, right?

Nigerian: Mm... nah.

American: What do you mean "nah"?

Nigerian: Well, our president also gave an example from the Bible about the prodigal son on how we should accept them with love.

American: Hold on. The prodigal son?

Nigerian: Yes.

American: I'm confused. So you're telling me terrorists killed military personnel, and the response was a Bible lesson?

Nigerian: Something like that.

American: So you guys aren't doing anything?

Nigerian: No, no. We're doing something.

American: Okay. What are you doing?

Nigerian: We're rehabilitating the ones we catch.

American: You're... rehabilitating them?

Nigerian: Yes.

American: Not prosecuting them?

Nigerian: Not according to our president, no.

American: WTF WTF WTF

Nigerian: I never even tell you anything, you don dey cry

[KHAN'✨ @khanofkhans11_]

iPhones hate mobile data. They are built for wifi.

[Babalola Esq.⚖️ @Owiggy_]

“Don’t judge anyone, it could be you one day”

Walai it can’t be me. Watin go make me r@pe chicken?😒

[$$$ @fwedesignerx]

I believe simps are mostly guy’s that don’t have cars, cause you no fit tell me say you send girl 500k when your steering rack don go

[Maxvayshia™ @maxvayshia]

Make una wake up oooo. From 25 tickets to 2 tickets active. End time world cup.

[Chichi @chibzyyyy]

I love football twitter so much😭