c

♊️ alumna / I make beats sometimes

[Not Today Eric @NotTodayEric]

“Stop by after work”

Are you insane.

[ひ @richoffud]

missionary so we can keep arguing

[b @saggyboobs]

she blocked me but blocks are used to build houses. i think she wants a future with me

[brit @booritney]

just heard a man order a pastry by saying "imma say what's up to this bread over here"

[The Tree That Can Move 🌴 @JumpShiveSlim13]

I asked to borrow some money from this chick so she could leave me alone. This bitch sent me the money.

[♒︎ @chai1anya]

fumbling me is crazy like i would've grabbed a star out the sky for you

[Shaynah ✨ @NahNahBad]

I sprayed my bf's door hinges with WD40 thinking I was doing a good deed. He said now someone can just enter his room silently and kill us in the night 💀

[Mr. Turtle @TheMisterTurtle]

I won’t tell anyone when I make it, but there will be signs.

[𝕯𝖞𝖑𝖆𝖓™ @Dylanszn01]

Dolly Parton never bought a fucking yacht for $800 million or flew into space. She bought books for kids.

[moss @brom3thazine]

I stopped cheating when dis girl beat me up in my mama front yard. She was at da door and seen it and rl jus closed it I thought the girl was gon kill me

[Alycia Baumgardner @alyciambaum]

In my own lane…and it’s quiet here.

[Mia @Miasznn]

If you miss a man, just text him. He’ll say something that’ll kill the feeling real quick.

[bellaᥫ᭡🍒 @vamp1bella]

making a grown man kiss his Camera on Facetime.

[Mr. Biscuit @Personhavingfun]

I dont know how to explain it but i only have until the end of March

[p.🕷️ @ptherulaa]

Cardi go ahead and call up Pooh Shiesty baby.