dolorous thespian

you open a door to another door to another to another door to another door

[dolorous thespian @classreduxist]

The old me, jaded in New York: no, you’re not “raising your vibrations,” you have schizophrenia

The new me, after living in LA for a year and a half and starting a meditation practice: I think I just caused that earthquake

[dolorous thespian @classreduxist]

My dad abandoned our fam when I was a teen, about 25 years ago. I reached out a year ago to tell him I forgive him and love him anyway. Not to pat myself on the back, but it means a lot to him what I did. And it unlocked something for me, now, too. Healing, I guess.

[dolorous thespian @classreduxist]

@spacepunk and found a whole bunch of stuff about it from various esoteric and spiritual traditions and was amazed. I still use this simple mantra regularly in meditation and in my life. Pretty cool dream. :)

[dolorous thespian @classreduxist]

@spacepunk I AM!!! And a final time, so intensely, like a deep bass shaking my whole dream being: IIIIIIII AAAMMMMMMMM! And then everything went blissfully quiet and still before the voice continued… “happy, calm, peaceful.” Then I woke up, simultaneously calm and shook and googled “I AM”

[dolorous thespian @classreduxist]

3/3

But I didn’t change my tires.

Then, on my mom’s birthday in September, while I was on a road trip to Ojai with my gf who happens to share my mom’s bday, my check tire pressure light came on.

I went to a tire shop and was told there was a nail in my rear right tire.

[dolorous thespian @classreduxist]

1/3:

On my bday (Feb) road trip to Death Valley this year I got a flat on my rear right tire. So I replaced just that tire.

Later in June I went to see a famous psychic out of curiosity but with skepticism. One thing she said was that my (deceased) mom was telling her:

[dolorous thespian @classreduxist]

2/3:

“Don’t let him leave without telling him that sometimes we have to change our tires! Yeah your mom is showing me your rear tires for some reason.”

How interesting! I thought. Funny sort of coincidence! Timing was wrong but —hmm! Maybe it was my mom! Who’s to say!

[dolorous thespian @classreduxist]

Something about the customary “may…” in (usually but not exclusively) dharmic and new age prayer requests kinda irritates me. “May [my wish] [be fulfilled]!” ? How bout… may we not overly rely on depersonalized, facile manifestation schemas! 🙏

(Jk it’s fine)

[dolorous thespian @classreduxist]

You only YOLO once!

[dolorous thespian @classreduxist]

Every Monday I check in w Latino coworkers like how was your weekend and they are always like

“I went to my gf’s uncle’s niece’s 4th cousin’s mother’s ex-husband’s grandmother’s childhood friend’s great-great-nephew’s 7th bday party and got super fucking hammered.”

I love them

[barbara johnson stan account @eleanoir]

my son has invented a new version of rock, paper scissors called the void, the infinite, the mind

[dolorous thespian @classreduxist]

During the intermission of the 3.5 hour tragic holocaust consequences Adrian Brody movie:

Hm I wonder who’s on the poly and kink friendly dating app right now

[dolorous thespian @classreduxist]

@Cuss_Flubber Now I wanna know what you were imagining lol

[dolorous thespian @classreduxist]

Being a prepper low key seems like a fun hobby

[dolorous thespian @classreduxist]

SAVED is my favorite Dylan album 😮‍💨

[dolorous thespian @classreduxist]

Draft leak time

[dolorous thespian @classreduxist]

@savbrads @TelepathyTapes

[dolorous thespian @classreduxist]

The Nosferatu discourse expressing confusion and outrage about people laughing at inappropriate times — something that genuinely bothers me at a lot of movies — is insane to me bc Nosferatu is *obviously* so campy and funny. That’s actually the best thing it has going for it imo

[dolorous thespian @classreduxist]

Santa only starts making his list on January 1. Everything between December 25 and Jan 1 is off the record.

[dolorous thespian @classreduxist]

Started workshopping this New Year’s Day but was too hungover to finish it…

Martinis before wine, all’s fine. Wine before martinis, something something Houdini (as in blacking out)