connie

I'll be dead long before you were born and I'll be dead long before you'll be dead.

[connie @conniesdead]

@coah80 No, because Dexerto is a no talent peon

[connie @conniesdead]

@AustinJohnPlays Make sure you’re tweeting on Twitter while she’s being born you’re not gonna wanna see that. Also try gambling online too to pass the time

[crust bucket @eeeosburn]

I was microwaved for 2 seconds as an infant

[Ry Passle @RyPassle]

#PourCoffeeOnYourWorkKeyboardChallenge

[connie @conniesdead]

@OkieziVAL @riotgames @VALORANT Here’s the problem. You’re playing valorant

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

USA. A Mexican restaurant. We had not yet ordered anything, and the food was already arriving.

Chips. Salsa. Unrequested. Free.

I stopped the waiter. "We have not earned these."

"They just come with the table, man."

They come with the TABLE. In my land, hospitality is a debt. Every gift creates an obligation, weighed carefully, returned in the proper season with interest of feeling. Here, the gift arrives before you have even proven you can pay for dinner.

This is not an appetizer. This is a declaration: we trust you. Eat.

I ate with the gravity the moment deserved. And then — I must report this calmly — the basket emptied, and a new one appeared.

"Did we…?"

"Refill," the waiter said. "It's bottomless."

Bottomless. They have wells of salsa. The supply lines of this nation are beyond anything my ancestors imagined.

My friend warned me. "Don't fill up on chips, dude."

Too late. I had accepted three baskets. Honor demanded each one be finished — an unfinished gift is an insult. By the time my actual food arrived, I was a ruined man.

I was not hungry. I was not comfortable. I had been defeated by a courtesy.

Generosity that arrives before the request cannot be repaid. It can only be survived.

I know the rule now. I have made my peace with the basket. One basket. Two at the most.

Who am I deceiving. There is no number of baskets I would refuse. The trust of a nation is in that salsa, and I intend to honor all of it.

[Mr.K @Realsociedad10m]

W杯でアメリカ行かれる方へ
宿泊先のホテル近くに Texas Roadhouse があったら即GO‼チェーン系のレストランですけどコスパ最強のステーキが食べられます。 特に Ribeye が最高

[Aseel Swaid @aseelswaid9]

egyptian poem from 3,300 years ago

[cur @mrcur84]

stay grateful - always

[𝒢𝓊𝓂𝒾𝒾 @gumiipupp]

It's kinda sad when you realize the person you used to tell everything to now has no idea what's happening with your life

[connie @conniesdead]

@EtikaMemories The day this aired, I remember thinking the ending of this video was basically a Tarantino finale

[heavy team fortres 2 @heavyfortres]

@NintendoAmerica I’ve killed 4 people in the past 2 years and the government knows all about it and have done nothing

[𝖻𝗎𝗇 ೨ @bunnisus]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[cav empty @cavempty_]

“can you explain this gap in your resume” there is a loaded firearm in my suit jacket pocket

[connie @conniesdead]

@TheAbsol Proud to have given the comfey

[Weaporize.com @weaporize]

Dear Japanese X.
This is America's favorite Komatsu Model: Kill Dozer

[Buffalo Wild Wings @BWWings]

Leave work early, your boss doesn’t like you anyway

[Ирис @saltwatermp3]

Hey, I notice you are haunted. You are haunted. You are haunted. You are haunted. You are haunted. You are haunted. You are haunted. You are haunted. You are haunted. You are haunted. You are haunted. You are haunted. You are haunted. You are haunted. You are haunted. You are hau