Colby Albert

[Kevin Roberts @KevinRobertsTX]

My message to the self-appointed global elites: Your time is up.

[Colby Albert @coolby15]

@spinn20 @RyanBallengee In where the Bears fuck.

[Colby Albert @coolby15]

Fuck yaaaa!!! #freebartman

[Colby Albert @coolby15]

#prayforernie

[Colby Albert @coolby15]

And Tom Brady gives the nfl a "jolly good rogering"

[Colby Albert @coolby15]

Man believers r going to be pissed when God comes back wearing white shades, driving a jacked up Ford w/ a "GODZILLA" sticker in the window.

[Colby Albert @coolby15]

Dear @KimKardashian if you don't dye your hair dark again soon I'm going to start jerking it to your stepdaaaa...stepmom?

[JasonLastname @JasonLastname]

ISNTISNT. The only way to stop ISIS.

[Matthew Barnaby @MattBarnaby3636]

Great trade for both Oilers and Pens. Immediate help for Pens and Oilers get worse which is better.

[Colby Albert @coolby15]

That crowd @PGAChampionship is louder than my mom's bathtub farts my entire childhood! #braaaaap #scarredforlife

[Earl Dibbles Jr @EarlDibblesJr]

If you're out playin' catch with your kids, make sure you whip it as hard as you can at 'em. World don't need any more city boys.

[Adam Proteau @Proteautype]

Kane & Toews sign 8-year, $84 million contract extensions. Toews celebrated by blinking three times; Kane is currently a one-man Mardi Gras.

[Johnny Knoxville @realjknoxville]

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

[Colby Albert @coolby15]

Dear God... if you can find it in your heart to kill Antoine Roussel, I will wear nothing but sweat pants with tucked in t-shirts for life.

[Colby Albert @coolby15]

You've never truly wished for a bigger dick until you've taken a piss wearing hockey pants.. #nastycaseofaveragecock @BlairMoe @TLightbown

[Colby Albert @coolby15]

The Canadian women will celebrating with the age old Canadian tradition known as... #beaverslappin

[DeLetty @GrahamDeLaet]

“@DUSTYTROUT: @GrahamDeLaet cost me a #proline commmmme onnnnn you owe me $5 #thanks”

It cost me a hell of a lot more than that...