Danny Gomez

Full-time trivia addict, sometimes half-assed open-mic comic. Hyphen enthusiast. I'm aware that my handle sucks. I have concepts of a plan.

[Neil Stone @DrNeilStone]

It took the US 35 years to gain measles elimination status

It took just two years of RFK Jr and MAHA to lose it

Truly pathetic stuff

[paris martineau @parismartineau]

if you're in line to disclose your affair with jensen huang STAY IN LINE

[Criminalsimpsons @Criminalsimpson]

completely forgot this joke existed and now I have a new favorite character

[Molly McCann Sanders @molmccann]

This is just terrible. Every one of these companies deserves to go bankrupt.

[Blind Mike @BlindMike_]

I was worried it might come to this

[David Hudnall @davidhudnall]

Spotted today in midtown Kansas City. Unfortunately, on some level, you do kind of gotta hand it to this guy

[pablo dickasso @chicocloudy]

crab chain is cold as hell

[Joe Pontillo @JoePontillo]

Things to say when someone sneezes:
- I don't respect you.
- God can't help you.
- Take that shit outside.
- This is why you're alone.
- Now I need a shot.
- This used to be a nice neighborhood.

[Danny Gomez @danMIA]

@MattTucker86 Absurd, even for a bot.

[Danny Gomez @danMIA]

@LargeFamDad @GridironComics If the founding fathers had wanted this country to be Christian by law, they would’ve made it that way instead of explicitly saying that the government cannot establish a religion. Fuck off.

[Danny Gomez @danMIA]

@LargeFamDad

[Danny Gomez @danMIA]

@oomficide From legal consequences, not from social or employment ones.

[Danny Gomez @danMIA]

@LeonSandoTXMN Wasn’t that always a problem? Hasn’t the border been closed for over a year? This is bc of MAGA idiots choosing conspiracies over known, tested science. Fuck off.

[Aaron Rupar @atrupar]

Massie: "I hope Hegseth addresses the 8 articles of impeachment, and doesn‘t get up and misquote the Bible in Quentin Tarantino fashion and do some pull-ups and call everybody fat and gay. I may have just given you half his speech, I don't know."

[TRENT ♓︎ ꕤ saw ari @jerekunnn]

@himbopottomus 😭😭

[allison harvard burke @alliharvard]

haiku by a robot

[ely kreimendahl @ElyKreimendahl]

having friends over isn’t about having a good time. it’s about being forced to clean your apartment

[🏋️‍♀️🦛 @himbopottomus]

toad getting 12th place in mario kart

[On Cinema at the Cinema @OCATCOfficial]

Is it the Cat in the Hat's Hat or the Cat in the Hat Hat?

[Danny Gomez @danMIA]

@realAndersonLee Lol. Yes, of course people will celebrate the death of a piece of shit, and yes, we would be better off had Trump died of covid. Donald Trump was positively gleeful when Biden announced his cancer diagnosis. Get fucked.