Danielle Ponder

[Texts From Last Night @TFLN]

(870): She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?

[Joan Rivers @Joan_Rivers]

A Sesame Street puppeteer may be involved in an underage gay sex scandal. Not shocking. The man shoves his hand up Elmo’s ass for a living.

[ironic @young_ironic]

I was born to party, but forced to study.

[ironic @young_ironic]

I wonder if Asian people put smileys like this ¦)

[Texts From Last Night @TFLN]

(732): I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero

[ironic @young_ironic]

"Wanna have sex?" Girl: "My doctor said I can't have sex for 2 weeks." Boy: "What did your dentist say?"

[Texts From Last Night @TFLN]

(512): Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on

[Detroit Red Wings @DetroitRedWings]

Lidstrom, on day two of retirement, managed to bring the house down at RHCP. http://t.co/9cBZvILg

[Detroit Red Wings @DetroitRedWings]

Oh hey! Chad Smith of the Red Hot Chili Peppers. http://t.co/nxMWGxLk

[Danielle Ponder @danielle_ponder]

Imma be flipping screaming little girls and not my hair tomorrow night trying to get to the joe for rhcp. #redhotchilipeppers #onedirection

[Danielle Ponder @danielle_ponder]

Sry #fashionstar but I don't know anyone who would wear pants with a crotch seam down to the knees. Bad choice guys, bad choice

[Ben P @Ben_o_Vici]

@RichGrisan #exams #finished #annihilated #success #score! #content #hateecon #thanksjill #educated #tigerinmybathroom #metbella #eyetwich

[Danielle Ponder @danielle_ponder]

76% on government final!!! Whoop whoop!! #victory #relief

[Rich Grisan @RichGrisan]

Texting @Ben_o_Vici when we are 20 feet away. #lazy #finals #popular #cramming #lightattheendofthetunnel #toomanyhashtags #obnoxious #theend

[Danielle Ponder @danielle_ponder]

Hoping for a curve in government. #pinsandneedles #niceprofessors

[Danielle Ponder @danielle_ponder]

When you are slightly large, wearing a cow print jacket is not advisable... #badlifechoice #beefy

[Danielle Ponder @danielle_ponder]

83.33% on 401 exam!! Yay!! #success #relief

[Danielle Ponder @danielle_ponder]

Feels so good to sleep in!! #happiness

[Danielle Ponder @danielle_ponder]

@RichGrisan @debbybalint fo shizzle yo