Dani Stone

Author. Loud-laugher. Wedding Officiant. Snark fan. LGBTQ ally. Will work for lemon bars. Raising awareness - Vein of Galen Malformation #VOGM

[Dani Stone @danimichelle]

DOUG - Have you tried Red Velvet cookies yet?
ME - No.
DOUG: Why not?
ME - Same reason I haven't tried crack. What if it's DELICIOUS?

[Dani Stone @danimichelle]

Not sure how Little Caesars got to be the official sponsor of the Super Bowl. Everyone knows their pizza is made from poster board and chipmunk knees.
That Crazy Bread slaps though.
#SuperBowl2026

[Dani Stone @danimichelle]

This is a real and actual product at Target for all those "packet of wet meat" cravings. 😬

[Dani Stone @danimichelle]

@JamesRenner
Mr. Renner - Meeting you today was a dream come true, and over a decade in the making. Wish we'd had more time to chat about all things twisty and mystery! You keep writing, we'll keep reading. Pinky swear. 😎📚☕️

[Dani Stone @danimichelle]

@SenSchumer Correct. All correct.
SO. DO. SOMETHING.
Get all the powerful dems past and present in a big ole room. Serve snacks. Make a plan. DO. SOMETHING. FIX. IT. A strongly worded Tweet doesn't save our country.
@BarackObama
@HillaryClinton
@SenSchumer
@MichelleObama
@CAgovernor

[Dani Stone @danimichelle]

"One month a year is not sufficient. " Amen.
Celebrate Black History Month!

[Barack Obama @BarackObama]

From our earliest days, Black history has always been American history – and Black folks have profoundly shaped our American culture through music, art, literature, sports, and beyond. One month a year is not sufficient to celebrate the power of the movements and the people who have fought for the rights we enjoy today. That’s something that we have to do each and every day, as we strive to live up to their example and make sure our children and grandchildren remember their stories.

[Dani Stone @danimichelle]

So help me I will put salmon and pimentos in a bundt pan, cover it with green jello and serve a horrific wiggly entree.

[Janel Comeau 🍁 @VeryBadLlama]

if they want to go back to the 1950s, we’re bringing the cuisine back to the 1950s too. you put me in the kitchen, I will spend 100% of my time in there finding how much horseradish and shrimp I can put in Jello before God personally comes down here to stop me.

[Bess Kalb @bessbell]

I am an undecided voter. Do I go with the slick eyeliner man who recites his slogans and shouts over women until they have to cut his mic, or the nice man who wants to give us healthcare.

[Desus MF Nice💯 @desusnice]

need pink to break out a real quick cirque du soleil flip over the audience

[MM  @adgirlMM]

Thank you Joe.
History will never forget. 💙🇺🇸

[Dani Stone @danimichelle]

@BeschlossDC It's my very favorite Biden! 😍

[Dani Stone @danimichelle]

@katie_grover "Night night." Hell yeah! 😎

[Dani Stone @danimichelle]

I remain confused about this ear accoutrement. Is it an envelope? Is it holding spare change and Werthers caramels? Is it a tiny pillow in case he gets seepies?
#RNC #TRUMP #RNC2024

[.:RiotGrlErin:. @RiotGrlErin]

one of my favorite things about first dates is watching the light in his eyes fade when he realizes i’m funnier than he’ll ever be.

[Jessica Ellis @baddestmamajama]

Enjoy the debate, for my mental health I will be watching something calmer and more reasonable, like the Fishes episode of The Bear.

[Dani Stone @danimichelle]

Psst ... I'm over at the Z party as danimstone if you want to stop by. Knock three times on the door. The password is - RED LICORICE

[Dani Stone @danimichelle]

"Daisy Dukes cut so high you can see her estrogen levels."
~ Dani Stone 2023

[Dani Stone @danimichelle]

Ten days ago my husband suffered a widowmaker heart attack and died in our bed. I performed CPR until EMTs arrived. He flatlined again in the ER. Yesterday he came home. Wild ride. Hug your people. Life is shorter than you think. ❤️
F*ck a heart attack!

[Dani Stone @danimichelle]

O-KAY 23andMe, Let's calm down and pump the brakes on the foreshadowing.
#mystery
#family
#DNA
#whodat

[Dani Stone @danimichelle]

How do I get a gig with the Bad Cat Calendar? Writing snark from the POV of a cat? Guys, that's a whole mood and I am DOWN! This could be my legacy!!
#badcat

[Dani Stone @danimichelle]

Double dog dare

[LGBTQ Nation @lgbtqnation]

Put #ReginaHall in a rom-com with #BradPitt RIGHT NOW #GoldenGlobes